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Monkey junkin

When a friend of yours hangs brain at a party or gathering
by mrsukurdinkis June 26, 2018
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Monkey rot

When a mixture of sweat, shit & friction come together between the arse cheeks causing chaffing and ultimately a sore ring piece
Oh no ive got monkey rot I'm going to have to have a courtesy wipe
by Mozza82 November 14, 2017
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Monkey Puzzle

A simple task that is undermined by one's own prolonged fumbling; a monkey puzzle is created once one has failed at a simple task multiple times.
*trying to turn the page of a book*
*page slips, try again*
*turns two pages by accident*
*book cover slips and closes by mistake, needs to re-find the page all over again*
"god damnit this is becoming a real monkey puzzle!"
by Yeebus November 29, 2021
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Smoke Monkey

City dweller, especially from a capital or on of the primary cities of a nation.
Often best applied to a city dweller who is out of place in country or sub-urban surroundings.
Someone from a 'big smoke' environment.
A concrete Tarzan.
Possible car theif.
Bloke 1: Dave, your mate Mick's got a headstrong attitude, why's he in people's faces all the time?
Bloke 2: He's a good guy, mate, but what'd you expect, dude's a fucking smoke monkey.
by Snowcaller September 3, 2014
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Desk Monkey

Definition 1. A person employed to do the administrative work as determined by the job and is not responsible for controlling or changing company structure or operations.

Definition 2. A person employed in an administrative position, that is overworked, undervalued yet is essential to the business organization

Definition 3. Someone who sits in front of a computer, day in day out, working for someone else
(Colloquial) "I’m just the desk monkey!" akin to "Don't ask me, I'm just the Desk Monkey"
"Go ask that Desk Monkey over there for the annual report"
"Get the Desk Monkey to do it"
by ValChic December 22, 2020
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Mysterious Monkey

Considered to be one of the hardest and most impressive sex acts out there the Mysterious Monkey is a combination of both The Houdini and The Monkey Face. Before beginning you must first conceal either pubic hair (or ass hair) using a proper sleight of hand technique. Now take your girl or guy from behind and give them a proper ramming. Just before you blow your load pull out and spit on their back. When they turn to look at the amazing load they just receive you simultaneously blow your real juices in their face and then smear the concealed hairs all over while they look on in complete shock and confusion. While extremely difficult to pull off if done right your partner will be so shocked and impressed they will not know how to process what just happened.
Last weekend I finally pulled off the Mysterious Monkey. Suzy and I were going to town and just as we were both about to blow I hit every part just right. The emotions after went from pure shock, to confusion, to anger, to one of the best laughs we have ever had. Took our relationship to a whole new level.
by Work Head December 1, 2018
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Monkey Tuna

A bitch made mahfuckah. They can have any one of the following traits or a combination of them. Some traits have not been discovered yet either.
A skinny white kid.

Wears a fanny pack.

Sticks his/her nose in all sorts of business that doesn't involve him/her.

Tries to be in control of other people.
Can share same character traits and flaws as a Mr. Bob Dobalina.
Lies about dumb shit.
Bites the hand that feeds him/her
Has a part time job sucking cock.
Easily intimidated by people larger than him/her
Leaves garbage everywhere.
Greedy
ALWAYS concerned solely with their agenda.
Diarrhea of the mouth.
Has an extremely distorted sense of their value and contribution(s) to society.
Gets confused when simple mathematical computations are required.
Social Climber
Interloper
Pits people against each other just for his/her own amusement.
Not very well-liked among peers.
if you actually did something to benefit someone OTHER than YOURSELF, people MIGHT not think you are such a goddamned monkey tuna.
by code313 May 26, 2014
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