Masturbate

What the fuck is wrong with you jackoffs get a girlfriend already

I masturbate because im lonely

by 5Skin not 4Skin January 9, 2020

Masturbate

Verb

To stroke your penis up and down until white shit comes out the top.

I masturbate every night.

by Joetherealone September 29, 2021

masturbation

when you beat the absolute living shit out of your meat package so fucking hard, that a liquid located inside of your ballsack called "semen", "cum" or "jizz", rapidly shoots out of your penis hole at 800 miles an hour.

it can also lead to your girlfriend becoming pregnant and having children if shooting out your hot sticky jizz while your erect, fat, thick, juicy cock is located inside of her vagina/pussy.

(alone (masturbating))
guy: omagash im boutta cum a large quan-titty of kids after this daily and excessive masturbation

(with partner)
guy: oh my gosh im gonna shoot my hot cum inside of your pussy!!!!!!!11111
girl: shoot it inside of me daddy uwu

by Hypurrelet August 14, 2023

ANUS MASTURBATE

It is a BOWEL MOVEMENT from start to finish and it has a PURE PURPOSE at a certain point.

Well, when you realize that this is the most PURE ACT in the world which is proven by the ultimate ASSHOLE LEADER your ANUS MASTURBATE and that is why it feels so good most of the TIME when SHIT passes from your ANUS into the ASSHOLE to the outside world.

by NOBLE PEACE SUNDER EEE October 13, 2021

Ethical masturbation

Ethical masturbation does NOT refer to a literal act of masturbation performed ethically, rather, it refers to an act of self loathing and self deprecation done with the goal to ease one's mind, it is often done as follows (conversation example):

Ethical masturbator: oh no, big bad me did a big bad thing
a normal person: maybe do something about it, then?
Ethical masturbator: no, I will just sit here and talk myself down so that I feel like I have been true to myself and so I won't feel guilty about something-bad-that-I-did/something-bad-that-just-happened-on-it's-own even despite the fact that I did nothing to fix it.

another form of Ethical masturbation is doing the same exact thing but rather than just indulging in self-loathing, one might also start asking supernatural entities (gods, spirits, ETC) for forgiveness

just saying that you are bad won't fix things, it's not remorse - it's Ethical masturbation

by Leo of the Харків December 28, 2024

must masturbate may

something that does not exist like your dad

Joe "When is must masturbate may?"
Jeff "When your dad comes back."
Joe cries

by IDK BUT YOUR MUM IS GAY November 21, 2022

Masturbation

The more you masturbate the smaller your dick gets

Did you know you get a smaller dick by masturbation

by Weeb2021staysafe December 29, 2021