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toilet massacre

when one ejects a metric fuckton on into a toilet without aiming (or with the toilet cover down), and leaves behind what looks like a war zone of poop on and around the seat.
What the fuck Megan, didn't you lift the seat up?! It's a goddamn toilet massacre in there!!
by joejoejoejoeyyyyy October 28, 2008
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Texas Massage

1.) When John Wayne comes out of your butt
2.) When you are tied down and stepped on by a horse
Riley: Do you want a Texas Massage?

Shane: HELL NO *runs away*
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3 Way By Mass

When you're having sex with a girl, who weighs as much as two girls. You're sexual experience weighs in as a 3 way...but there are only two people in the bed.
Person A: "Is John really hitting on that fat chick over there?"
Person B: "He'll be in a 3 Way By Mass soon enough."
by Random human June 18, 2009
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Grafton, Massachusetts

Grafton Massachusetts was founded by Elias Coopersmith, Earl of Lockenshire, a wealthy land baron of the early colonial era. Coopersmith was born in England, however, migrated to the America's after receiving a large land grant from King James I. He brought his wife, Rachel Coopersmith, formerly Rachel Sutherland duchess of Clackmannanshire, Scotland. The duchess was a notoriously stubborn woman and was said to have caused the Earl a great deal of distress in his early years. Even friends of Lord Coopersmith, such as the pious Cotton Mather, were quite distrustful of the young bride. Mather described her as "slack jawed Irish teague." Mrs. Coopersmith was often confused for a crass irish peasant as she did not delight in the common pleasantries of a gentile existence.
Grafton was eventually named after Lord Coopersmith's mistress, Margot Hery Grafton III. Margot was the daughter of a local cooper who shared a bed with the Earl during his travels to Boston and Salem. Rachel Sutherland was said to have moved to Virginia to live with her brother Christopher James McHale IV, a wealthy plantation owner who had made an early fortune on his export of indigo and tobacco.
This history although long and often confusing tells very interesting tale of the foundation of Grafton Massachusetts. Walking through the streets of this small country town you would never know its name was founded by the efforts of a lonely coopers daughter in the bedroom of a small Inn in East Boston
The phrase "as backwards as Grafton, Massachusetts" came from this tale
by Christopher Whalen January 5, 2009
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deep tissue massage

A massage that includes a handjob
That woman offers deep tissue massage so I guess I am going to get a handjob
by bigolddumbass December 17, 2008
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Massage

When a lawyer researches something to death so he can continue billing the client on the same matter.
Erik massaged the regulations until the client moaned.
by Joyce DeWhat July 26, 2009
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Woburn, Massachusetts

City just North of Boston where 93 and 95 intersect. Referred to the people who live there as the "wu". Has town pride out the ass GO TANNERS. People tend to generally be gangsta, but you can't include everyone in that statement. It's a place where a lot of tragedy happens to young adults..too many deaths at too young an age.

Also a place where the girls can drink just as much as the guys can. Overall, its not a bad place, but you don't want to be stuck living there your whole life.
john: hey let's go to woburn, Massachusetts for that party we heard about
tim: you sure kid, I hear woburn's kinda ghetto
john: nah, it'll be a good time
by nonjudgemental8 March 1, 2010
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