1.) When John Wayne comes out of your butt
2.) When you are tied down and stepped on by a horse
Riley: Do you want a Texas Massage?

Shane: HELL NO *runs away*
by King John Wayne the Second March 24, 2011
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when someone beats a rattlesnake to death with a baseball bat or any other hard sports item.
"the other day little john juan yelled snake!"
"what did u do?"
"i gave that serpent a good ol' west texas massage with the woman's sex toy"
by THUNDER_N_U_T_Z February 23, 2010
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