kylie guarino

Kylie might seem nice but when you get to know her she’s crazy. She’s flat and definitely not thicc she is thin with two n’s. She’s about 7 ft tall and she’s flatter than paper.

Wow no one can be flatter than Kylie.
Girl: wow she’s kylie guarino

by yolohandke February 6, 2018

Dole Guardian

A DWP employee who is under a sworn oath from the government to prevent anyone and everyone from claiming benefits.

Russian Brute: Where's my money? I have one slice of bread left for dinner.
Dole Guardian: Your claim has been closed.
Russian Brute: I'm half blind, half deaf, have one arm, a sore back and metal kneecaps.
Dole Guardian: You are eligible for work. Here is a leaflet.
Russian Brute: What am I supposed to do eat that? *goes into Audi and plays rave music loudly*

by binmunbruce August 30, 2019

guarding the bee

The act of performing an utterly meaningless task given to you solely to keep you out of the way. The name comes from an episode of The Simpsons in which Homer, and two others, are tasked with guarding a bee in a jar in the plant's basement while the Nuclear Regulatory Inspector is visiting.

Bernie: Duh, why are we down here?
Homer: Aw, geez. I told you Bernie, guarding the bee!
Bernie: But WHY?!
Homer: Aw, you guys are pathetic. No wonder Smithers made me head bee-guy.

by Astrolounge April 7, 2009

strum guard

a strip of towel wrapped around the wrist of one's "strum"-minging hand, secured by gaffer tape, and is used to "guard" against abrasions when playing guitar. invented by joe strummer (born: john graham mellor) due to his furious playing style.

joe strummer never plays his telecaster without his strum guard.

by normers January 12, 2006

strife-guard

To help others who are having difficulty in a situation you are familiar with.

John, having been in a similar situation when he was a child, decided to strife-guard the boy who was too afraid to go down the slide.

by jmb0225 August 27, 2009

Splash Guard

To put a sheet of toilet paper in the toilet before a power poop to eliminate sound and splashback

I just ate at white castle and the next day at work i used the bathroom and it was packed, so to protect my dignity i put down a splash guard.

by 12MATZIE December 5, 2009

fact guaranteed

A "fact guaranteed" is an emphatic affirmation of a thing or a situation (usually positive), that is either held to be true or about to happen.

Something agreed upon.

A promise, a binding oral contract.

person 1: you going to Rock Werchter hey?
person 2: fact guaranteed man, fucking fact guaranteed!

by burkehey October 13, 2009