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Douchanium

The element in which all douche bags, bros, Guido’s, and meatheads feed on and excrete; known to smell of tag, fresh Tap Out shirts, Nattie Ice, and fist pump sweat; prolong exposure to Douchanium may cause “Douchanium poisoning”.
You: “Coming to Buffalo Wild Wing’s was nice, but man I feel weird. I’m suddenly getting a headache and an urge to fake tan, pop more than one collar, and fist pump…”

Friend: “No, man, that’s just because the Douchanium around here is off the charts!!! We better get going before you are exposed to more Douchanium poisoning.”
by pants are optional July 24, 2010
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doucheagogue

A portmanteau of demagogue and douche, meaning a rant, speech, or any sound from a douche which resembles an ill-fated, weak systematic argument.
I had to listen to Steve's doucheagogue for an hour about how he's fighting for hipster rights, and hipster marriage.
by Hasselhoff_ist_mein_Held January 30, 2012
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Doucheaholics

All the assholes who keep posting political definitions of Urban Dictionary
Person 1: damn 75% of Urban Dictionary in the last months is about Trump or Hilary
Person 2: Serious doucheaholics posting that stuff
by SkankHunt42.0 February 9, 2017
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douchemaster

one who most readily demonstrates himself as master of douches

October 2004: Alex Rodriguez, NY YANKEES
"F&^%N A-ROD! What a douchemaster."
by Grampa foam May 13, 2005
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douchemagnet

One who finds themselves attracting pretty ugly people.
Dude, did you see that douche Rob was with? He's a total douchemagnet!
by holasenor May 7, 2008
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doucheatorium

A man made or natural structure made of way to much gold that is designed to house douchery on a mass scale. Some of the key design features are but not limited to, unlimited supply of overused hair jell, shirts with the top three buttons missing, never knowing when to stop talking about the endless pointless stories on the time they did blah blah blah, continuously pointing out their calligraphy tattoo and how it means awesome, industrial cologne applicator, a gigantic shirt with 4 popped collars, and probably every driver who has cut you off, ran a red light, or sped up in the passing lane only to slow down after to hold up everyone else and the entire fox news organization.
Guy 1: Man this party sucks did everyone here just come from the doucheatorium or something.

Girl 1: I know, I can't believe it, there must be a world shortage of buttons because everyones shirt is missing the top three and where did all these NickleBack cd's come from.
by directly at the sun April 25, 2010
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doucheable

Term used by female to describe a male who is a douche yet still doable. Can also be used by males in extreme cases of female doucheness.
Eh. I guess he's doucheable.
by tpoo July 15, 2010
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