Comcast and coitus

The act of sexual intercourse while having Comcast on the TV in the background.
Boy: Netflix and chill?
Girl: Sorry, I only have cable.
Boy: How about Comcast and coitus?
by Mattoooo October 24, 2015
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getting Comcasted

A. Losing connection or experiencing an extreme LAG spike at a pivotal moment when you need your internet to work, such as a boss fight in an online game or during a big presentation over zoom.

B. also known as getting "Xfinity'd"
Hey guys! Sorry I caused us to wipe and lose hours of raid progress - I keep getting Comcasted.

My apologies, Mr. Arasaka. I got Xfinity'd during the presentation with the investors. I'll commit seppuku now...
by Tamilder April 16, 2021
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Comcasting

A sex move in which you shit on your partners face while punching them in their genitals and then send them a bill for it.
"How is your date going?"

"He's comcasting me, but I'm the one who agreed to it, so I'll just have to pay the check when the time comes. It sucks that the dating scene is so small."
by SingleModeFiber November 03, 2015
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Comcasting

(V) The act of changing a neighbor's TV programs with you're Comcast remote. Generally done from outside a family room window so as to see the neighbors' reaction. This works because all Comcast remotes work with all Comcast cable boxes.
Paul:Hey, wanna go ding-dong ditching?
Jimmy: I'd rather go Comcasting.

Barb: Why did the TV channel just change?
Marge:It's those darn kids, they're always Comcasting.
by JumpinGinger February 07, 2011
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Comcasting

A sex move in which you shit on your partners face while punching them in their genitals and then send them a bill for it.
Last night, my girlfriend decided to end things as a result of me comcasting her in our bedroom. Unfortunately, I'm the only guy in town so she's stuck with me.
by TheWizzanator18 November 02, 2015
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comcast chav

annoying but nice Comcast guy that comes to your house to fix your tv. making you feel uncomfortable and akward because he's invading your privacy, and dressed like he thinks he's Justin Timberlake in his olden days. (chav attire)
walks out the door saying "have a good one sir"
me- "is sir annoying leaving?"
dad- "what do you mean?"
me- "the comcast guy is kind of making me feel akward. is he leaving?"
dad- "no, he's gonna try to fix the tv"
me- "oh, that's annoying..."

*walks away, thinks to self, what a comcast chav*
by Angie12banjo December 04, 2010
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Comcasted

To be fucked over by comcast customer support including but not limited to customer service, comcast technicians, or the comcast equipment they provide. This also could include technicians not showing up to the job and lying about leaving messages.
I got comcasted today when I left work early to wait for Comcast to come and repair my internet only to not have anyone show up for the appointment.
by mrobz February 18, 2016
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