coitus somnus

When you fall asleep over a guy, while having sex

I was just sooo stoned that he proveoked me a coitus somnus.

by Emergency call May 18, 2011

coitus queen

A girl that you have sex with and love but can be naggy at times and freaks out when her period is one day late

If she keeps this up she will be my coitus queen

by Beekthewind November 29, 2012

coitus reservatus

Edging, or more simply, trying not to cum as long as humanly possible.

The members in the Oneida community practiced Coitus Reservatus

by AnEntymolygist November 15, 2013

Coitus interzisgus

The act of committing to go have drinks with the lads and then pulling out last minute to prevent next morning hangovers or trouble with the wife. There is a positive correlation between the above and Coitus interruptus.

Opposite: Brexiting - telling everyone at the party that you are leaving, but actually staying.

Oi, did Marc come out get gazeeboed with the lads last night?

Nah, cunt’s pulled a coitus interzisgus. Said he had to work late. He’s just too slow or too stupid.

Or both.

Fuck yes mate! Fuck yes!

by TommyTulpe April 9, 2019

cross coitus

The act of two male roomates banging two females who are also roomates.

Bob: Hey Brett, Lizzy is coming over to add to my bucketful of pussy. I think Erin is coming with her.

Brett: Dude, we should totally ass to mouth the both of them and cross coitus in the same room.

by xKeithMcBrayerx4L November 1, 2011

HardEggInAss&CoathangerSyndrome

I was feeling rather horny, so I shoved a hard-boiled egg in my butt on a whim. It gave me the satisfaction I craved, but to my horror, when I tried to get it out, I discovered that it was lodged in my rectum.

This was around four hours ago, and the egg is still in there. I'm getting very scared. What should I do?
Update: I just tried fishing it out with a coat hanger, and it became snagged. I am bleeding profusely.

You Just Did A HardEggInAss&CoathangerSyndrome

by DarknessPlayz September 27, 2018

coitdog

An obsequious grovelling toerag who has their brown nose up the "coit" (arsehole") of a person in authority. Derived from the fact that dogs always sniff coits.

I was put on detention because that filthy little coitdog dobbed me in.

by Alfonso of Fyshwick April 20, 2006