Meat Tool 

noun 1 An extremely foolish, stupid or contemptable person. 2 A penis

John is such a meat tool, he blew a whole month's wages on a pair of shoes.

I caught my boyfriend sleeping with my sister while I was at work! He's such a meat tool!

Gillian will charge you only 25 dollars, and you can insert your meat tool where ever you please.

Meat Tool by Mrs Moo June 29, 2010

Brightest tool in the shed 

When someone fucks up ither telling someone they arent the sharpest tool in the shed or the brightest lightbulb in the box

Stupid Ass Friend: Hey, you're not the brightest tool in the shed are you! LOL
Me: Stupid fuck

Brightest tool in the shed by Josh Jeffery May 28, 2007

thunder mug tool kit 

What every toilet should have to ensure a confident and successful shit.Beside the basic toilet brush and commode plunger,a hatchet for chopping megaturds into flushable units,a pair of bar-b-que tongs for unjamming toilet paper clogs and at least one elbow length rubber glove for retrieving cell phones and wallets accidentally dropped in the toxic soup.A pair of grass clippers also comes in handy for snipping off stalled turds that come halfway out and stop and are too dense to be pinched off by sphincter action alone.

I keep my thunder mug tool kit in a bucket right beside the toilet.

thunder mug tool kit by wolfbait51 June 7, 2011

Twilight Tool 

The 16 to 18 year old girl or gay man who had no idea what Twilight was until they saw the big hype over the upcoming movie.

The person generally went to go see the midnight showing of the movie without reading the books, and the next day went to the mall to buy half off Twilight apparel at 'Hot Topic.'

After these events, the person will go to 'Barnes and Noble' purchase a cappuccino, buy the twilight books, carry them around their high school, and pretend they are a vampire.

"Hey John, do you see Jenni over there with her brand new Twilight books?"

"Yeah, they still have the price sticker on them, what a 'Twilight Tool'"

Twilight Tool by Zachary M. McComb January 22, 2009

simple tool 

A pejorative nickname for someone who demonstrates a lack of intelligence or curiosity.

On more than one occasion, the 45th POTUS, sometimes known as President Poptart, has demonstrated himself to be a complete simple tool.

simple tool by Dr Bunnygirl October 15, 2019

Phone Tool 

A phone tool is a Man/Women that is always on the phone to seem inporntant that actually seem like meaningless fucks that kind of look retarted.

Austyn Spaulding: Hey dude why is your dad on the phone so much.
R.J: I have no idea
Austyn Spaulding: He is a totall phone tool

Phone Tool by Austyn Spaulding June 29, 2010

Blue Tool 

The knob that is yapping loudly on his blue tooth while his eyes dart around hoping to find someone listening in to overhear him “move and shake” because all the difference makers are in a Wal-Mart midmorning in their khakis yapping on their cell phones.

Guy #1: Check out this douche yapping on his cell phone.

Guy #2: That’s no douche, that’s a blue tool.

Blue Tool by Nickola15 July 13, 2010