Apple Patch

A patch of facial hair that covers the Adam's apple. Originally a derogatory term, the apple patch broadcasts a man's sex appeal (similar to a happy trail).

Girl 1: Mmm did you see that guy?
Girl 2: Yeah, he has a damn fine apple patch.

by Bawksigrill420 April 16, 2015

Chastity Patch

A small smear of excrement surreptitiously smeared on the back of one's girlfiend's neck before a girls' night out, in order to deter any would-be suitors.

The missus was going out on her work Christmas party the other night and that smarmy git from accounts was there, so I gave her a Chastity Patch when she asked me to fasten her necklace.

by 7Kev7 May 16, 2007

prison eye-patch

It is the spreading of the scrotum over one's eye.

If you don't shut up, I'm going to give you a prison eye-patch.
Motti gave Yaron a prison eye-patch to show his love for him. Yaron loved it.

by master of my domain. May 1, 2009

Terry Pratchett

Despite being one of the funniest writers alive, and having a nearly unsurpassed level of creative genius, this man is *still* largely underrated as one of England's most brilliant writers, with writers like J.K. Rowling walking away with the most fame and recognition for books that are, in comparison to the Discworld novels, overrated piles of crap. There's nothing in Terry Pratchett's works that could make me keep a straight face- EVER, and each novel is utterly hilarious in a well-worded, balanced fashion that conveys a distinctive style of British humour that's become Terry Pratchett's style. The man might be coming along in his years, but he's shown NO signs of slowing down over the years... hilarious, creative, witty, and able to write novels that're both clever and compelling without overdoing humour or storyline. That's the true essence of Pratchett's genius; not just being funny, but keeping readers involved in the book rather then the jokes alone.

Pick up one of his novels and give yourself a laugh. If you find yourself reading through at least a single chapter and can't laugh at least ONCE, you're in need of some serious psychological assistance.

"Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day. Set fire to the man and he's warm for the rest of his life." ~ Jingo, another of Terry Pratchett's more well-known novels.

by Alhadis July 31, 2008

Terry Pratchett

The best selling author still alive in England. Famous for his discworld series.

He lives behind his keyboard in Wiltshire, trying desperately to respond to his fan-mail

by Schteen May 22, 2003

two legs and a wet patch

After many long months with no sex you would settle for it. Man, animal, female etc.

It has been that long I would settle for anything with two legs and a wet patch

by The_Devon October 19, 2009

Patchwork Boyfriend

Piecing together a boyfriend by means of multiple partners. One gives it up on the reg, one actually spends money on you by taking you on dates, and one fills the everyday needs of hanging out or companionship. When combined, you have the perfect man. (In the ideal situation, the individual components don't know about the others). **This term can also be flipped and used to reference a piecemeal girlfriend.

Hey Mary, what did you get into last night? I tried calling you.

John and I just chilled at the house for a while, then Kevin took me on a really nice lunch date. Oh, and I met up with Ben late night for a drink..we totally got it on again!

Well, sounds to me like you hooked yourself up with one hell of a patchwork boyfriend!

by RaggedyA December 15, 2010