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absolutely

The one word that will get your boss / parent / authority figure to give you the "deer in headlights" look and leave you alone. Regardless of what is being discussed; i.e. 1)drawn out over explained instructions on how to do a simple task 2) Typical Parental Lecture 3)"Do You Know Why I Pulled You Over?" situations.

Instructions On Use: Step One - Wait For Pause In
Assailents Ranting
Step Two - Make Convincing And Direct
Eye Contact
Step Three - Say "Absolutely Boss, Dad
, Officer, Etc."
Step Four - Walk Away And Proceed Going
About Your Business
BOSS: "Hey (your name) Im glad I found you. Look Ive got a
bit of a situation. You see Tim was sick today, and
that means that his typical collateral duties of
emptying the trash in the managers office hasnt
been completed. I know you know how big an issue
this is. I mean wow if I could just get you to..."

YOU: "Absolutely" (remember to lock eyes and put on your
best "Im not stupid" face)

BOSS: .............

YOU: (proceed to carry on about your business as if nothing
happened)
by Odiumnox December 21, 2005
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Absolute Unit

A person or object, who is large in the sense nothing can get in their way.
e.g. Martin Najemi
Oh, Look over at Martin Najemi, That absolute unit just barged through that crowd!
by AbsoluteUnit999 February 11, 2020
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What the absolute fuck?

When "What the fuck?" isnt sufficiently exasperated enough, "What the absolute fuck" is used.

Same as "What the actual fuck?" except more localized in New Zealand.
John: What the absolute fuck is Jim doing?
Dave: I have no idea man

Jim: Hey Mike someone shat in your shower bro
Mike: What the absolute fuck?

John: Man this is badly organized...
Jim: Yeah I have no idea what the absolute fuck is going on.
by BloodBomb January 5, 2011
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Absolute idiot

Someone who puts the milk in before the cereal.
Paul is an absolute idiot. You're supposed to put the cereal in before the milk.
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Fabsolutely

A word used as an adverb and/or adjective to describe a person, place, thing or idea that one considers to be fabulous in every sense of the word, or 'absolutely fabulous' in addition to other adjectives.
I'm all decked out tonight and I feel fabsolutely amazing!
by PURRfection December 15, 2018
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absolutelybangable

completley uderly BANGABLE, like stop you on the street bangable.
Wow my boyfriend is absolutelybangable!!
by your hott sex turns me on! February 17, 2008
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absolute pitch

Absolute pitch (commonly referred to as perfect pitch) is the rare musical ability to distinguish notes and pitches without a given reference. For example, people with AP can automatically spot the difference between an "Gb" (G-flat) and a Db (D-flat) without any hints given. The odds of being born with AP is 1 in 47,000 people, making this phenomenon rare. Absolute pitch can be distinguished in people who are blind since birth, and in most cases, people affected by Williams Syndrome and autistic spectrum disorders. Some famous examples of absolute pitch include John Phillip Sousa, Ludwig van Beethoven, Julie Andrews, Freddie Mercury, Yanni, Steve Vai, Mariah Carey, Michael Jackson, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Franz Schubert, the Mendelssohn siblings, Leonard Bernstein, Stephen Sondheim, and Andrew Lloyd Webber.
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart is said to have been born with absolute pitch, playing one of his father's piano sonatas correctly four minutes after listening to it. He was at the age of four at the time.
by ThrashBash November 4, 2013
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