desk jockey 

US Military term (ca. 1960s-1990s) used by "line" types (fleet, aviation crew & flightline, special forces, infantry) to refer with contempt to HQ and staff (non-operations) personnel, especially bureaucratic types who push petty regulations as a way to harrass others. Also used as mildly derisive term by aviation types to refer to crewmembers temporarily removed from flying and assigned "desk" (non-flying) duties for administrative or disciplinary purposes.

What asswipe desk jockey came up with the idea of prohibiting bags (flightsuits) and cammies in the NCO Club for lunch? Guess those clerks didn't want all those grubby SOBs who work for a living spoiling the view...

desk jockey by Speedstan May 19, 2008

Desk Potato 

One who sits at a desk all day long but gets little to nothing done -- usually because of websurfing or playing computer games. Derived from couch potato. Differs from desk jockey in that although employment involves a desk, nothing is getting done.

Jim has become a real desk potato. Between Mahjong and Minesweeper he manages to squeeze in a few hours on MySpace, and then he plays RPG's 'til midnight.

Desk Potato by someoneouthere September 14, 2008

desk staging 

The practice of covering your desk with papers, completed work, and other important-looking papers to give the appearance that you are really busy when really you're surfing the net, watching YouTube vids and doing other non-work things.

"My realtor taught me this trick of staging my house for sale so I tried it at work, I started desk staging so it looked like I was too busy to take on another task and voila, my boss bought it!"

desk staging by MJBarton May 21, 2016

desk mojo 

the sacred stuff on top of or inside your desk used to entertain you and no one else

Guy 1: hey, this is a cool little thing you-
Guy 2 : No! Stop touching stuff you're messn' up my desk mojo.
Guy 1: Ok bro chill.

desk mojo by lookwhaticando April 6, 2013

desk fucking 

When you drill a hole in a desk and fuck the hole and then cum into a pencil box

There was a kid desk fucking at school.. I never saw him again after that.

desk fucking by Salmon_Slapper May 23, 2017

Desk Pop 

The act of firing your weapon into the air while sitting down at your desk.

*gunshot*
Hoitz: SHOTS FIRED! What the hell are you doing?!
Gamble: I did my first Desk Pop! It's a real thing, right?
Hoitz: A deskpop?!?
Gamble: Yeah!
Hoitz: What are you, a moron?!?!

Desk Pop by moopMASTER 2000 August 26, 2010

Desk Pillow 

What you make when you arrange your books and folders on your desk at school or work for optimal comfort when putting your head down to take a nap.

"Dude, I made the most comfortable desk pillow EVER in chemistry last period."

Desk Pillow by Generic Tux September 30, 2009