Helpless executive syndrome 

the condition in which an executive, usually male, is able to manage thousands of employees and millions of dollars but incapable of figuring out things like transferring a phone call or scheduling things on his own calendar

Gordon Wainworth, who suffers from helpless executive syndrome, was standing utterly mystified in front of the Keurig machine, randomly pushing buttons and calling for his secretary to help him.

Helpless executive syndrome by Jill Bystrom October 13, 2017

armchair executive chef 

A person that, through watching Food Network, believes they are now qualified to edit menus, adjust restaurant recipes and provide advice to people that actually work in the Food and Beverage industry.
AEC for short.

Chef, I've got an AEC (Armchair Executive Chef) in the dining room that suggests we use Extra Virgin Olive Oil in the fryer.
Great, tell him his fried will be $48 dollars.

armchair executive chef by vegasrew April 13, 2007

executive dysfunction 

That mood you get into when you know you need to do something or want to do something but just can't get yourself to get up and do it. Begging yourself to get up and do it but you just can't.

Brain: you need to study for that AP test today
Me: you're right, I really should so I don't fail this time.
Body: nah, just watch Tiktok
Brain: please, you really need to
Me: please, I'm begging you, just study
Body: ...nah
Brain: I really hate how my ADHD comes with executive dysfunction

executive dysfunction by Assume I'm a goddess :P April 22, 2021

Executive Privilege 

Sweeping term for justifying activities like that of a dictatorial regime. Invoking Executive Privilege allows a once-elected leader to avoid any accountability for wrongdoing, and force appointed officials to break the law as well.

Congress: You’ve been subpoenaed to testify, regarding evidence of you feeding Vladimir Putin national intelligence materials.

Executive Branch: Nah, fuck that bruh, I invoke executive privilege. Let me golf in peace.

Executive Privilege by ZmanIsTheMan3 September 21, 2019

executard 

An office executive who does nothing but spin wheels in order to appear as if he is an important piece of the corporate puzzle, when he is really doing next to nothing. Usually extremely highly paid, with a platinum parachute.

Jim, you haven't convinced me yet that you are anything more than an executard. Let's have another drink. You're buying, right? You fucking tool.

executard by Mike P. Grant July 18, 2007

executive decider 

The guy at the top. Someone upstairs whose paid the big bucks to make the big decisions (;and, maybe not much of anything else get done by this person).

President Bush declared that HE is the Decider.

The magic eight-ball often stands-in as EXECUTIVE DECIDER.

When the governor refused the Stay of Execution, he de facto became the EXECUTIVE DECIDER in that convict's life.

executive decider by Chengo Bolemongo October 6, 2006

The Executive

Dropping a deuce in such spectacular form, as avoiding having to wipe at all.

I was running late this morning, but I was saved by "the executive".

The Executive by dirt dog October 18, 2011