Shit In My Hands and Clap 

A way of objectifying to or expressing utter dislike for something.

I'd rather shit in my hands and clap than vote for Donald Trump.

Shit In My Hands and Clap by RossF92 August 19, 2016

hands up don't shit

When you're friend is trying to say "hands up, don't shoot," but instead says "shit"

Person 1: that touched me, but not in a gay way
Person 2: don't start pointing at charts and dolls and shit, HANDS UP DON'T SHIT

hands up don't shit by LiteralCancer2.0 March 23, 2018

Shit Hand Andy

A term used to describe someone who is being or doing something retarded.

Originated from when 'Andy' was written on the outside wall of a special school in what appeared to be feces.

Omg, stop being such a shit hand andy.

What a shit hand andy thing to do.

Shit Hand Andy by xMousey March 9, 2008

Shit Hand 

When you go to wipe your ass and either A) the toilet paper you've chosen to use fails resulting in shit all of your hand. B) Said toilet paper does not exist or C) Somehow shit actually finds it way onto your hand.

Also related: Poop Thumb (Which is a lessor case of above - Shit Hand)

I was in the toilet when my toilet paper ripped in half, so I have a severe case of shit hand right now.

Ever have poopthumb? Well I have shit hand, that is a whole other list of problems.

Shit Hand by BiggyBigs April 18, 2010

shit handshake 

To knowingly or unknowingly shake someone's hand directly after having a shit without washing ur hands, the other person might be too embarrassed to sniff their hands after the shit handshake.

I'm gonna give him/her a shit handshake.

shit handshake by villos69 February 9, 2017

shit in a hand bag 

"Shit in a hand bag" is an expression used when something unexpected happens.
Much like finding a turd inside of a pocketbook this event is of a great surprise to you.

"Shit in a hand bag! I've lost my keys again!!! Shit in a hand bag!"

shit in a hand bag by Haroldhrmph June 25, 2014

Don't shit in the hand that slaps you 

To have respect for those who control your manners, paycheck, and just plain the way you act.

Such as.... 1) don't shit in the hand that slaps you as in your parents because they slap you with that hand by controlling your existence. 2) don't shit in the hand that slaps you as in your boss or supervisor because they control raises at review time and promotional futures. 3) don't shit in the hand that slaps you if of your wife or girlfriend because, well, we all know what she does with that hand don't we?

Don't shit in the hand that slaps you by OverHung October 31, 2011