127 definitions by thewesthamfan

copulate

to have illicit intercourse with a serving police officer

sgt. cryer told thunderthighs that if she let him copulate with herin the panda, then he would'nt charge her with
soliciting

by thewesthamfan November 15, 2003

lost in space

to have sexual intercourse with a woman with an exceptionally large/loose vagina

"blimey sean" "I thought kev's next door neighbour was quite tasty 'til i gave her one - no good - lost in space"

by thewesthamfan December 10, 2003

tinsel tampon

a tampon festooned with tinsel

jennifer - "have you got ant tinsel tampons?"
assistant - "yes, but only for the Christmas period."

by thewesthamfan November 19, 2003

perm three

male homosexual partners have the chance of a permutation of three. viz.
1. partner A. foreskin partner B. no foreskin
2. partner A. foreskin partner B. foreskin
3. partner A no foreskin partner B. no foreskin

steven minced in "hi duckies, alec's got a new partner""perm three?" questioned kevin "not likely" retorted steven "he's gone and got himself a bloody gnome"

by thewesthamfan December 10, 2003

ceremonial shag sheet

the white sheet with the central hole that is used to separate the male/female torso during penetrative sexual intercourse

Aaron: "thought I jus' seen a cyclopic ghost back there"
Hymie: "Nah, it's jus' your big brother playing with his ceremonial shag sheet."

by thewesthamfan January 20, 2004

ball control

1. In soccer, the ability to control the movement of the football using ones feet etc.
2. In sex, the ability to control the movement of the testicles thus preventing ejaculation.

1. George B**t had incredible ball control, he could run the length of the pitch dribbling.
2. George B**t had incredible ball control, he could keep it up for hours before ejaculating.

by thewesthamfan January 13, 2004

faece furniture

IKEA, MFI etc.

ann & bernard went to buy a chair from IKEA but declined because it was faece furniture

by thewesthamfan November 17, 2003