the evil steve's definitions

bolt out of the brown

1) A completely out-of-context shitty thing to do or say, especially from an unexpected source. From the elderly phrase "bolt out of the blue", but modified with skidmarks for flavor.

2) (driving) Some asshole coming from out of nowhere to bust your chops (cut you off, tailgate and honk, etc.)

1) Our night out was pretty bangin' until Chess Club Bill dropped that ear-splitting N-bomb at the bar. What a bolt out of the brown!

2) Jesus! Where did this pissed-off horn-addicted Excursion-driving dickhead getting all up my tailpipe materialize from? This fat bastard was a bolt out of the brown!

by The Evil Steve June 23, 2007

f-mail

A very angry e-mail reply, often loaded with profanity or implied profanity. Can be either personal or business-related. Not to be confused with a flame, f-mails are issued as an expression of extreme dissatisfaction with a specific situation... where you eventually call somebody a monkeyfucker.

When my wireless card crapped out, Chris from Tech Support sent Tech Release 1.01b. When I e-mailed that Tech Release 1.01b didn't work, he sent Tech Release 1.01b. When I e-mailed him again that Tech Release 1.01b has nothing to do with my problem, he sent Tech Release 1.01b. I then f-mailed Chris, questioning his parentage and telling him to give the farm animals a rest.

by The Evil Steve May 8, 2006

pastafarian

Worshipper and follower of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

Have you been touched by His Noodly Appendage? Then put on your pirate outfit and join the Pastafarians!

by The Evil Steve September 5, 2005

NBN

Shorthand for No Beers Necessary. Used to describe a person so attractive that one wouldn't require a drink to inspire or prepare for denting headboards with them. Can be spoken as 'nibben'.

Guy 1: "Did you see the body on that chick? She's totally NBN!"
Guy 2: "Ummm... dude... she's got three eyes and one eyebrow. Ease up on the Jaeger! Nice rack, though."

by The Evil Steve August 24, 2005

communist

1) (rare) one who strives to attain the ideals of communism (see cako's spot-on definition)

2) (common) impotent jibe intended to put down a non-like-minded person. Insult had some impact during the Cold War-era, but so did Styx.

1) True communists are idealists who truly believe humans can transcend selfishness. Then the weed wears off.

2) There is a 99.5% chance that Rush Limbaugh would call you a communist.

by The Evil Steve September 3, 2005

McChristian

Chest-thumping churchgoer / religious donor who loudly proclaims his or her righteousness based solely on their Sunday attendance / offering. Tend to think they can get away with being braggardly arrogant self-important arseholes because they actually spend an hour or two in / a few bucks on church every week. They tend to cover their auto bumpers and SUV backglass with stickers alluding to Jesus, quote Biblical scripture completely out of context, and privately pleasure themselves to kiddie porn while chiding anybody who dares mention anything sexual in public.

The jagoff who cut you off coming out of the church parking lot - you know, the one in the $49 polyester suit jacket who flipped you off - this past Sunday morning is a McChristian.

by The Evil Steve September 5, 2005

heavy rotation

The set of 15 or so songs that Clear Channelesque cookie-cutter format radio stations play at least once an hour 24/7 until their Major Record Label BitchMasters tell them (or pay them) to play something else.

If a song you like makes heavy rotation, you'll hate it in two weeks or less. If a song you hate makes heavy rotation, you'll want to pull your brain out through your ears. Changing the station won't help, since every format radio station across the continent plays the same friggin' 15 songs in heavy rotation.

The MILF anthem "Stacy's Mom" was a fun song until it made heavy rotation - now I don't even want to bang Rachel Hunter anymore.

by The Evil Steve September 5, 2005