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the colonel's definitions

sockrifice

A sockrifice occurs when a person runs out of toilet paper and is forced to use a spare sock to wipe one's bum.
Dude, we ran out of teeps yesterday and this morning I had to peform a sockrifice.
by The Colonel July 18, 2003
mugGet the sockrificemug.

goldbricking

To loaf or goof around on the job. Supposedly an old union term describing laborers (or more specifically, bricklayers) who were going so slow, it was as if each brick were made of solid gold. One can alse be referred to as a "goldbricker".
Dude, I spent all day at work goldbricking - surfing the web, making long distance phone calls - basically just picking my ass.
by The Colonel August 5, 2003
mugGet the goldbrickingmug.

klugle

The jamming of one's thumb into the deck of a surfboard - caused by extremely hard surf wax being applied to the board on a cold morning and then catching on the existing wax.
Dude, it was so cold this morning that I got the worst klugle when I was waxing my board. I almost bent my fingernail back.
by The Colonel July 18, 2003
mugGet the kluglemug.

baby rattlesnakes

Young punks that are full of testosterone and looking to get into fights.
Dude, the NOFX show was cool but the pit was full of baby rattlesnakes.
by The Colonel July 18, 2003
mugGet the baby rattlesnakesmug.

kookmeyer

Wilbur Kookmeyer, a popular cartoon character from Surfer Magazine. He is the epitome of a kook - can't surf worth a shit and is a complete friendless loser (except for his dog, although you get the impression that his dog thinks he's a kook, too), but loves surfing and thinks of himself as a pro-caliber ripper. Hated by all other surfers and constantly humiliating himself and behaving like, well...a kook.
Huntington Beach is full of kookmeyers, especially all those 30-something dipshits who act like locals but can't really surf worth a shit.
by The Colonel May 11, 2004
mugGet the kookmeyermug.

Scotched

A state of mind induced by drinking copious quantites of scotch. Usually can be identified by a happy, mellow feeling at night and a dry mouth the next day.
Don't drive while scotched.

Why go to a bar and drink when you can sit home and get scotched?
by The Colonel December 2, 2004
mugGet the Scotchedmug.

stamp licker

a mentally handicapped person
that stamp lickers tongue hangs so far outta his mouth he should get a job outside the post office.
by the colonel December 6, 2003
mugGet the stamp lickermug.

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