telephony's definitions

timber bell

A timber bell is a fairly large (~1 foot dia.) bell in a tavern or bar that is readily accessible to customers. When the bell is rung, the customer who rang it buys a round for the house.

{ding! ding! ding!} Hey, somebody just rang the timber bell! Free drinks on the way!!!

by Telephony May 19, 2021

vaccume

A very common misspelling of the word, “vacuum"; used most frequently to describe an electrically-powered cleaning device or the vacuum of space. Appears entirely in writing, because it is pronounced the same as the word, “vacuum".

{Craig}: Dave, can you vaccume the hall dear? (yes, Craig & David are F46607s)

{David}: Awww man, isn't it your turn to vaccume? (takes a pair of dikes {the wirecutters, not the other kind!} and snips off the cord)...ummm Craig, this vaccume cleaner's busted!!

by Telephony September 3, 2013

pee IN the toliet, not ON the toliet!

An admonish men given to males with bad aim while passing micturition.

I just had cataract surgery; now I can pee IN the toliet, not ON the toliet!

by Telephony June 15, 2014

douchewasher

What some people might call a dishwasher, esp. when they truly hate to load & empty the thing.

Tom, it's your turn to load the douchewasher after dinner!

by Telephony September 7, 2013

synthetic finger popping

The sound of somebody popping their fingers, created solely by synthesizer hardware or computer software synthesis -- not all unlike how synthetic clapping, synthetic cans, synthetic car horns, etc. are produced.

Kat McSnatch's song, "I Don't Like You" is terrific, but it would be even better if it had synthetic finger popping it instead of real finger popping.

by Telephony April 30, 2015

poop water

poop water (/pūp ˈwɑtəɹ/) noun.

Water or mud that has a high percentage of fecal matter (e.g. horse-puckey) in it.
Usually reeks rather strongly of poo.

Don't run that R/C truck through that puddle! It has poop water in it!
Piss you that fucking puddle reeks like fucking horse-puckey!!!

by Telephony June 29, 2019

Supertolietbowl

What the Superbowl is to some people.

{Dave; on telephone}: Hey Jenny, want to come over to my house today to watch the Superbowl? I'll have lots of hot wings, burriotos, Cheetos, and beer!

{Jenny; on telephone}: Sorry Dave...I've got plans to go to the mall with my girlfriends today, so you'll have to watch the Supertolietbowl by yourself.

by Telephony March 11, 2012