provider44's definitions

face pet

to stroke someones face in order to cool their fears and soothe their mood

As Clyde faded out of consciousness in the arms of Mary we all knew that the face pet she was applying would have no effect in this dire situation.

by provider44 January 17, 2010

whorticulturist

any person who has sex with plants often

Jenny was a staunch and steadfast whorticulturist. She had sex with her favorite fern Benny way more often than her other plants.

by provider44 January 17, 2010

mon now

abridged form of come on now but mon now is full of comical disbelief

Scott: why did you come in late and heavy foot all over the place
Adam:You must have been dreaming that i didn't do that I swear

Scott:Mon now?

by provider44 January 15, 2010

j-shored

to feel if as you have lost all brain power and devolved into some sort of primate subhuman hybrid after watching reality television for an extended amount of time.

I collapsed like a lubed up combination ladder in my bedroom after being j-shored by the reality show marathon i could not pull myself away from today.

by provider44 January 16, 2010

boog

any person watching a sporting event who gets much pleasure in the faux catcall. This is when it sounds like they are booing the player when they are actually making the same low deriding tone, but the word chanted is either the players name or a nickname that is similar to the booing sound.

This crowd is filled with many a staunch boog. Too bad we have to witness this all game. Next year they play in our stadium so it shouldn't be nearly as annoying.

by provider44 January 19, 2010

boink

to sleep with someone over 250 pounds

Jeremiah buttered himself up and allowed himself to be gang boinked by three ultra portly asian ladies.

by provider44 January 17, 2010

Dr. Stinkenstein

After being with someone long enough you eventually graduate from comfort school and begin to fart at will in their presence with no qualms.(This is the time period where it is amusing to both parties: see Dr. Stinkenstein emeritus)

Pam: Baby it stinks a little in here. Did you fart.

Paulie: Of course, they call me Mr.Stinkenstein at work . You can call me Dr. Stinkenstein.

by provider44 January 17, 2010