pantaloon's definitions

carson

1) Verb meaning to take a golf club and swat at someone's testicles (ala Johnny Carson)
2)The act of holding someone's balls to the forehead in order to concentrate (ala JC's Carnac the magnificent)
3)A means to get a new car advocated by Toyota.

1)I passed out on the floor of my frat house and awoke just before Weber gave me a carson. I fled through the pantry door with my morning wood intact.
2)I wouldn't say I was her fuck buddy per see. Sure, I got off, but I was starting to suspect that she needed to think, and was only waiting till I slept before she carsoned me.
3)That Toyota Prius is looking sweet. What would the total carbon output be if I were to carson my subaru?

by Pantaloon January 14, 2008

coochie war cry

1)known also as a handy, this ancient method of rousing the troops has been a native american custom from before the landing of De Soto and Armstrong. It involves the rapid paddling of the labia until Custer is surrounded.

The minutemen were ready only 50 seconds after hearing the furious spattle of the "coochie war cry." The Seneca had used it to great advantage in the French and Indian War and the militia would not let that lesson go unlearned. Betsy Ross was in no mood for an unloaded musket, so she left the armory doors wide open.

by Pantaloon January 17, 2008

finless brown trout

fish that can be domesticated, but which is often flushed prematurely. Often dumped into toilets, and mistaken for dead as it has no eyes, fins, tail, and doesn't seem to swim.

Timmy didn't want to flush the toilet, but his daddy reassured him, telling him he would restock the waters within hours with fresh finless brown trout.

by Pantaloon January 14, 2008

finless brown

analfish that populates the toilet. eyeless as well. Often known as Finless brown trout.

I feel the need to stock the pond with finless browns

by Pantaloon January 14, 2008

cotton panel

Apparently something that allows a vagina to breathe.

1)She seemed to be suffocating, but the gathering crowd didn't seem concerned. Her panties were constructed with a cotton panel.
2)When asked if her pussy would like something to eat, she seemed surprised, but the bartender motioned to her cotton panel, and she gave him a Mentos smile and agreed that a cocktail might do the trick.

by Pantaloon January 14, 2008

brooking

A form of entertainment similar to cow tipping. It involves walking along a small creek with an unwitting companion, who is then shoved headlong into the drink. There seems to be an entire think tank devoted to the subtle art named The Brookings Institution. Visitors from Urban neighborhoods are often subjected to this chilling dip.

Janice could not wait to make out with James, but before they could get to the boathouse, he had brooked her. It was her first brooking. They say you never forget your first one.

by Pantaloon January 14, 2008

dinglestone

1)A small pebble one acquires on the road along the coast of Dingle, Ireland. The descendants of this region are partial to placing them on the mantle as a nostalgic gesture.
2)The final phase of transformation of the dingleberry, the melding of Toilet paper and fecal matter which ensares itself in orbit around the sphinctoid.

1)My Uncle Seamus mistakenly placed his own dingleberries on the mantel alongside his snott balls and toe jam until they hardened to dinglestones. He had never been to Ireland so had never seen that the stones in Dingle were more of a greyish tone than his brown progeny.
2)She had produced a sharp dinglestone which caused a stabbing pain on her inner ass cheek., but others complimented on her sexy new style of walk. She was torn about removing the little fella, whom she had affectionately dubbed O'Heinehy.

by Pantaloon January 14, 2008