Definitions by northbot

candybar money

Money demanded upfront that has extremely diminishing returns.

You could have enough money for a game system tomorrow if the loan servicers didn't want candybar money for last year's Christmas loan this month.

candybar money by northbot September 26, 2026

Le Moose distance

Measured phonetic distance from Streetlamp Le Moose and thus measured ethical credibility.

Pete Camp Caboose is to Le Moose distance as a 3 is in Bacon number and can be trusted with Gamestop keys upon hiring.

Le Moose distance by northbot September 19, 2026

Ontariophilia

The sexual attraction and excitement to the thought of engaging in intercourse in highly acidic or chemically compromised waters — not to be confused with pedophilia.

I never have to worry about internet content filters on routers because I only require an image search of the Great Lakes on account of my Ontariophilia.

Ontariophilia by northbot September 2, 2026

hookup shaman

n. A hookup buddy that guides you through understanding a complicated and intense relationship that is likely leading to marriage at the cost of STDs or pooping out spawn of unknown origin.

I had an argument with my fiance and my friends didn't understand but my hookup shaman brought me back to a center worthy of a trip to an abobo clinic.

hookup shaman by northbot August 19, 2026

guerrilla psychologist

(n.)plain clothes nurse on ground level looking for unmedicated crazies to whitevan

That man is uncontrollably expressing sexual frustration in a Woody Allen sort of way enough for the local guerrilla psychologist to disappear him.

guerrilla psychologist by northbot July 21, 2026

tittie milk

(n.) an opaque liquid that is fortified in nutrient beyond the assumed definition of "milk" as in that of a cow.
Examples:
1) carnation instant breakfast
2) milk from the breast of a human being
3) blue milk
4) fitness supplement

The stock market crashed and I am considering hitting up the red cross for blood and organ as I am unable to afford that tittie milk.

tittie milk by northbot June 25, 2026

snog shock

shock from learning conceptually that America lacks snogging, especially the non-alcohol-catalyzed snog, in social custom and setting.

He's just hit snog shock and is a little jet lagged; I think we should just put some microwave tea beside him and leave him where he is for now.

snog shock by northbot May 29, 2026