nethcev!'s definitions

Death

A state of existence that men tend to seek at their worst hours, and avoid during the rest of their years.

Deaths in 2003 (according to the World Health Report): 29.2% from cardiovascular diseases, 12.9% from Ischemic heart disease alone. 19.5% from parasitic diseases, lead by HIV 4.9%. Malignant neoplasms (growths and tumors) 12.5%, 2.2% from trachea, bronchus and lung. 6.7% from respiratory infections and 6.5% from respiratory diseases, chronic obtrusive pulmonary disease leading them with 4.8% of worldwide deaths. 6.2% from so called accidents, road and traffic injuries leading at 2.1%. 4.3% can be attributes to prenatal conditions, 3.4% to digestive diseases, chronic liver disease and cirrhosis of the liver combine to include 1.4% of worldwide deaths. Neuropsychiatric disorders such as Alzheimer’s take 1.9%, diabetes mellitus claims another 1.7% and Nephritis, nephrotic syndrome and nephrosis another 1.2%. Intentional injuries make 2.9% with suicide leading at 1.5% followed by homicide at 1.0% The remaining 3.7% died of various causes ranging from drowning to being mauled by a bear/bears.

by nethcev! January 2, 2006

Chemistry

The study of meaningless numbers and letters through complex equations, usually taught by a professor who owns or operates a methamphetamine lab on the side to help subsidize his/her meager income.

While I failed high school chemistry, my teacher was fired the following year for incompetence.

by nethcev! August 23, 2006

Joke

Like matchsticks of humor, jokes, when kept dry, ignite flames of laughter.

"It was just a joke!"

by nethcev! August 26, 2006

Boston

A popular nomenclature, first coined by the people of Massachusetts to describe a colossal labyrinth of seemingly unnavigable streets and causeways.

Boston, Massachusetts

by nethcev! August 24, 2006

Individualist

One who refuses to adhere to or conform to the ways and standards of others, and thus has instead decided to live by his/her own unique standards and unorthodox practices just like all the other unique and unorthodox individualists.

"I'm not very much of an individualist."

by nethcev! August 26, 2006

Sinner

One who is better at being a pastor than a saint.

"God have mercy on the sinner
Who must write with no dinner,
No gravy and no grub,
No pewter and no pub,
No belly and no bowels,
Only consonants and vowels."

John Crowe Ransom

by nethcev! November 3, 2006

Journalism

The art of expunging all of the art in writing.

For perfect examples of how journalism undermines art, see the guidelines listed in the AP Associated Press Stylebook.

by nethcev! August 18, 2006