nethcev!'s definitions

Time

An infinite resource which, despite its limitless reserves, few of us ever seem to have enough of.

Time,

There is nothing before me, and nothing behind.
I have nothing to lose, but yet nothing to find.

by nethcev! August 18, 2006

Apologetics

A branch of Christian theology devoted to the study and defense of the holy origins of scripture, as well as the divinely ordained authority of the Church alone to interpret it. To fail apologetics is a sign of intelligence.

My "F" in freshman Apologetics eventually led me to drop out of semenary and enroll in an Ivy league University.

by nethcev! November 22, 2005

Smile

An insignificant facial expression which is intended to suggest feelings of euphoria, satisfaction or relaxed complacency to others, but in actuality, more often serves as a social mask to disguise one’s true feelings.

Oh villain, villain, smiling, damned Villain!
My tables - meet it is I set it down,
That one may smile, and smile, and be a villain;
At least I'm sure it may be so in Denmark

Hamlet, Shakespeare

by nethcev! September 5, 2006

exorcist

One who combines the power of prayer with sacred ritual, as part of a desperate attempt to drive demonic forces from the bodies of spiritual hypochondriacs.

You can usually find an exorcist or two on one of those Hallmark channels that broadcast only at three or so in the morning.

by nethcev! August 24, 2006

History

1. An argument for the cause of the present.
2. The study of man’s previous disasters, taught to ensure that future generations will never make the embarrassing mistake of repeating them, but will instead set about making new and even more complicated blunders.
3. The study of catastrophic events and the assholes that caused them. While preparing for an historical exam, one should note that any individual mentioned in the assigned textbook who was responsible for the death of at least a quarter of a million people, is probably worth mentioning on the test.

History is in itself an example.

by nethcev! August 20, 2006

Marriage

The sacred and legally binding prelude to divorce.

The marriage of Carmen Electra to Dennis Rodman, the marriage of Tom Cruise to Nicole Kidman, the Marriage of Brad Pitt to Jennifer Aniston etc, etc, etc,

by nethcev! August 17, 2006

Sinner

One who is better at being a pastor than a saint.

"God have mercy on the sinner
Who must write with no dinner,
No gravy and no grub,
No pewter and no pub,
No belly and no bowels,
Only consonants and vowels."

John Crowe Ransom

by nethcev! November 3, 2006