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me old fruity's definitions

crazy frog

A ringtone created by satans very own spawn, Jamster. Not content with ripping off the sound from something called 'the insanity test', they created a hellish blue frog that for some mysterious reason had a tiny shrivelled blue wang, which becomes all the more confusing when you learn that frogs don't actually have wangs.

Do not underestimate just how irritating this er, 'phenomenon' is. If they played this, on loop, at 120 decibels, over the hills of afghanistaan, Bin Laden would come running out of hiding after just 5 minutes offering total surrender and some free dirt on Saddam to boot.
on chavs however, it has no effect.
i would like to feed the crazy frog microwave popcorn kernels, nuke it, and watch the fallout land smack bang on jamster headquarters! B-ding ding ding ding SPLAT
by me old fruity July 1, 2006
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Going to see Paul

A euphemism for the act of defecation. Based upon the Glade 'Touch 'n' Fresh' advert where the boy will only do a poo at his friend Paul's house.

Taking a shit, laying cable, cutting off a length of dirty spine
Just going to see Paul, be back in 10!
by me old fruity July 18, 2011
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fannytastic

like fantastic but much cooler with much more emphasis. it must be pronounced with emphasis too. it is most commonly used in, but not limited to, the discussion of lady parts and/or lesbians.
The vicar of Dibley, Geraldine, said to Alice that shagging model Rachel Hunter would be 'fannytastic'.
by me old fruity November 8, 2006
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foxy brown

1.one who does not write their own songs.
from the rapper foxy brown who is pretty much the running joke of of other female rappers such as lil kim and eve, because people like nas write her songs for her. therefore has beef with both lil kim and eve.
'don't you know i write my own sh!t?! send that sh!t to foxy!'-lil kim
'i can't be waiting on her and her ghostwriter to be coming back at me. not my fault she hasn't had a hit since 1996 and her bank account is looking the same'- eve
by me old fruity August 30, 2005
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e meter

a trick employed by scientologists to try to scam you into taking their 'therapy' sessions at $400 a pop. here is a guide. beware:

1. First a scientologist will approach you, offering you a free stress test. you will know they are a scientologist, as they will have the staring, unblinking 'crazy eyes'. they will be very reluctant to take no for an answer.

2. if you do go with them, they will hook you up to an 'e meter'. they will ask you to think of some deeply troubling experience, and when the meter moves slightly, they will present this as evidence you need therapy.

3. you will end up paying $400 a session to have whats troubling you 'audited' (cleared) from your mind. but get this: whats troubling you is, apparently, the souls of murdered aliens (thetans) in your head. betcha didn't see that one coming eh?
i'm sick of these scientologists trying to jack my nads with their e meters
by me old fruity June 19, 2006
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go catch a fish

something snoop dogg used as an insult on doggy-fizzle televizzle, to much amusement.
by me old fruity September 10, 2006
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fag

1. British Cigarette
2. Homosexual
3. Short for faggot, a bundle of wood, once used to burn homosexuals at the stake in less enlightened times, which is where the insult comes from.
4. What younger boys at private/boarding school are refferred to by their seniors. 'fags' have to do stupid jobs like warming toilet seats. Roald Dahl was one.
1. 13 yr old: giz us a fag
me: sod off

2. chav: 'haha, that man is wearing a pink shirt, which means he *must* be a fag!' (as clinically proven by the logical individuals at ChavLab©)

3. mad puritan: arr, get me some willowe faggots so i may burn this young scoundrel, so no man may know i am rather partial to a goode bumming myselfe'

4. 'FAG! go lick my shoes clean!'
by me old fruity September 5, 2005
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