Girl :"Heres a picture of my crush"
Farmer: "I think youre showing me the wrong picture, thats just a boy. My crush is in the barn"
Girl: "Can i meet her?"
Farmer: "Is there someone who should be looking after you or something?"
Farmer: "I think youre showing me the wrong picture, thats just a boy. My crush is in the barn"
Girl: "Can i meet her?"
Farmer: "Is there someone who should be looking after you or something?"
by mandatorysodomy January 16, 2018

Something people shout at cats in an attempt to scare them off.
Something that cats use to get back at people who shout "scat" at them
Something that cats use to get back at people who shout "scat" at them
I saw a stray cat out in my yard so i screamed SCAT at it. Next time i went out i found it had rubbed its shit all over my patio. Guess it was my fault for suggesting it
by mandatorysodomy May 12, 2018

"Gay hat, man"
"Thanks, i just got it today. Wanna get a drink?"
"Sure, lets go to that bar, people tell me its a gay bar."
"Lets invite your friends, theyre pretty gay."
"Good idea. This day is turning out to be really gay."
"Thanks, i just got it today. Wanna get a drink?"
"Sure, lets go to that bar, people tell me its a gay bar."
"Lets invite your friends, theyre pretty gay."
"Good idea. This day is turning out to be really gay."
by mandatorysodomy January 16, 2018

by mandatorysodomy January 16, 2018

by mandatorysodomy May 22, 2018

When you have long hair and one of them somehow detaches from your head and gets stuck between the lower cheeks. When you take a shit you will notice that the hair has somehow not only remained attached to your arse, it has become attached to a piece of shit too, anchoring it to your behind. Woe betide the luckless person who doesnt notice the shit crane in time and ends up dragging the shit out of the toilet when they check the paper.
by mandatorysodomy December 11, 2017

When your girlfriend/wife is on her period but youre both too drunk/horny/repulsive to care so you have sex anyway.
Last valentines day my girlfriend was on her period, so we planned to have a quiet night in, but after two bottles of wine we just decided to go with the flow
by mandatorysodomy May 12, 2018
