An appliance used by fat security guards for keeping all the food responsible for maintaining their waistline above 50 inches. To anyone else who has access to it its a repository for steaming piles of shit.
Pork Scotch (opening the Pork Scotch Fridge): Dear God what's that smell!
Maybe your food's gone off.
Pork Scotch: Someone's put a bag of shit in my fridge!
I saw some niggers hanging round earlier.
Pork Scotch: I'll kill 'em all!
Maybe your food's gone off.
Pork Scotch: Someone's put a bag of shit in my fridge!
I saw some niggers hanging round earlier.
Pork Scotch: I'll kill 'em all!
by Kenny Spoffo-Grumpbeetle August 20, 2009
An old man with 2 walking sticks who is such a genius he can walk at a 90 degree angle. He leaves his home once a day to display his unique talent to the envious world under the pretext of going to post a letter.
Who is West Bridgford's finest athlete?
That'll be Alf Trolleydocker, the 90 degree genius.
Where did he get his walk from?
I believe he got it from a corner shop.
That'll be Alf Trolleydocker, the 90 degree genius.
Where did he get his walk from?
I believe he got it from a corner shop.
by Kenny Spoffo-Grumpbeetle August 17, 2009
The token midget at every Asda store. They are employed not only to pacify the Equal Opportunities brigade but also because they're really good at getting tins that have rolled under the shelves.
Dad, why is that little boy working on the checkout?
That's no boy, that's the Asda midget. Every store has one.
That's no boy, that's the Asda midget. Every store has one.
by Kenny Spoffo-Grumpbeetle August 17, 2009
Monkus: Dad! Klingon alert!
Dad: Don't worry, its only Daniel Lumphead. Its David the Grunting Spacker you need to worry about.
Monkus: Shit, this place is full of retards.
Dad: Don't worry, its only Daniel Lumphead. Its David the Grunting Spacker you need to worry about.
Monkus: Shit, this place is full of retards.
by Kenny Spoffo-Grumpbeetle June 19, 2009
The vehicle of the Porky Scotcher's mother which the important security guard takes her out in. This chair has appeared in comedy photographs taken by Monkus and Mickus.
Quick Monk, get in the Scotchy Mother's Wheelchair before Goofy Granny gets back and I'll take a photo.
by Kenny Spoffo-Grumpbeetle July 25, 2009
A barbecue made out of a rusty barrel cut in half. Also known as a Pork Scotch Oven this shitty type of barbecue is most commonly used by little fat men with horrifically ugly girlfriends.
Thought you said the little twat had a barbecue.
Its over there, look. A half-barrel barbecue. Its a barbecue for complete losers.
Its over there, look. A half-barrel barbecue. Its a barbecue for complete losers.
by Kenny Spoffo-Grumpbeetle August 06, 2009
by Kenny Spoffo-Grumpbeetle July 25, 2009