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joedaprogramma's definitions

Big Bowl of Mistake-i-oes for Breakfast

The Breakfast of fuck-ups : not for everyone every day but certainly everyone at least once. A breakfast of bad ideas one eats early in the morning then shits throughout the day in a series of missteps and failures like : flat tires, lost car keys, broken friendships, tax audits and fist fights over low-priced household goods or parking spaces. Always to be avoided.
Evan: That's a girl's jacket.

Tucker: Huh ?

Evan: The zipper and buttons. They're on the wrong side. It's a woman's jacket. You're wearing a woman's jacket.

Tucker: ....I got it at a consignment store; I honestly did not know. Will you run me down with your car, please ?

Evan: After I send this picture around I will. You ate a Big Bowl of Mistake-i-oes for Breakfast !
Tucker: Make it look like an accident.
by joedaprogramma November 22, 2020
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blubbersowse

A fat sow that cries and drinks rum a lot
Kaitlyn: Where is she ?
Gustav: At the bar , weeping and slamming shots.

Kaitlyn: Again ? She's 220 pounds !
(together) blubbersowse !!
by joedaprogramma December 9, 2024
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2D3D Shock

Webcam communicating with someone 2D at work for years only to meet them in person 3D suddenly causing serious disconcerting shock.
I got 2D3D shock when I met the offshore team from Madrid at the conference. Alejandra is hawt.
by joedaprogramma February 23, 2024
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Fire in the hole

The phrase uttered by a seriously constipated person as a good-luck expression just before trying a waxy suppository for the very first time (typically one you steal from your grandma's medicine cabinet).

20 minutes later, you find out how fuckin' wise grandma actually is.
Molly: (whispering) ....Fire in the hole ....

(20 minutes later, after Molly shits her colon inside-out and rinses it in the sink)

Grandma: (Knock-knock) ....Oh, honey, run the fan and light a match.
by joedaprogramma January 8, 2013
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hairpothesis

A hairpothesis is an enthusiastic idea one gets about one's hairstyle that is promptly implemented often without good result.
What's the hairpothesis with that danceline ? They look like sea otters !! When they slap the floor and hoot like that it makes me think they're trying to get us to ignore their uniform new hairstyle !! Are they trying to look like that Robert Palmer video from the 80s ?? Tough look to get away with...
by joedaprogramma June 7, 2023
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