joedaprogramma's definitions
A funt is the abbreviated form of the phrase "fat cunt". It is used in hostile situations and is a dense, multi-faceted , gender-neutral and highly effective insult. Men can be funts; women too. It shocks the recipient into pitiful self-recognition and can injure them psychically, making it a sort of delicious "tactical nuke" favored by the truly verbally brutal looking to land that knock-out blow.
Listen, ya FUNT. You've never had a pretty day in your life, you've shit several pups and now you want to start World War Three with the store manager because they stopped selling your favorite baked goods. Maybe you should just leave and walk home, getting those bulbous labia some badly needed exercise!! ...Oh shit, I thought you were a lady , Mister President !
by joedaprogramma December 26, 2018
Get the funt mug.A rotcock is somebody who has REALLY pissed you off with bad customer service. The word itself suggests that they have a venereal disease, but in fact they're just somebody who gave poor service out of stupidity. You're so angry at them that you have difficulty thinking clearly. Rotcocks : hate their job, cannot read, blow spit bubbles, love Tony Danza and are incapable of giving a shit.
Customer: Fries, shake and cheeseburger please.
Rotcock: Hold on a sec; I'm drooling in the ice cream machine and staring at the mop bucket.
Customer (20 minutes later) : That rotcock forgot my fries !
Rotcock: Hold on a sec; I'm drooling in the ice cream machine and staring at the mop bucket.
Customer (20 minutes later) : That rotcock forgot my fries !
by joedaprogramma January 1, 2014
Get the rotcock mug.A hairpothesis is an enthusiastic idea one gets about one's hairstyle that is promptly implemented often without good result.
What's the hairpothesis with that danceline ? They look like sea otters !! When they slap the floor and hoot like that it makes me think they're trying to get us to ignore their uniform new hairstyle !! Are they trying to look like that Robert Palmer video from the 80s ?? Tough look to get away with...
by joedaprogramma June 7, 2023
Get the hairpothesis mug.The phrase uttered by a seriously constipated person as a good-luck expression just before trying a waxy suppository for the very first time (typically one you steal from your grandma's medicine cabinet).
20 minutes later, you find out how fuckin' wise grandma actually is.
20 minutes later, you find out how fuckin' wise grandma actually is.
Molly: (whispering) ....Fire in the hole ....
(20 minutes later, after Molly shits her colon inside-out and rinses it in the sink)
Grandma: (Knock-knock) ....Oh, honey, run the fan and light a match.
(20 minutes later, after Molly shits her colon inside-out and rinses it in the sink)
Grandma: (Knock-knock) ....Oh, honey, run the fan and light a match.
by joedaprogramma January 8, 2013
Get the Fire in the hole mug.A Jersey Louie is a right-hand turn followed by an immediate U-turn near the same intersection, in simulation of the compulsory jug-handle left turns common in the State of New Jersey. They intentionally effectuate a very safe left turn over the intersection , and are similar in shape to a jug-handle turn (without actually being one). A Jersey Louie is a ideal for when an accident or other fuck-up is clogging your egress leftward. Legend has it that Jersey Louies are the informal antecedent of formal jug-handle intersections.
Hotchkiss: I need to turn Eastbound but that ice cream truck is busted down in the left turn lane.
Michaela: Do a Jersey Louie.
Hotchkiss: Good thinking! A Thousand Blessings ! We slipped past that cluster-fuck at the light !
Michaela: Do a Jersey Louie.
Hotchkiss: Good thinking! A Thousand Blessings ! We slipped past that cluster-fuck at the light !
by joedaprogramma July 28, 2016
Get the Jersey Louie mug.