joecoolthefool's definitions

Crapper cripple

The numbness and muscle weakness that comes from sitting on the toilet for too long. You struggle to stand up because prolonged sitting has compressed the nerves and blood vessels to your legs. poop paralyzed, doo doo legs, crapper, bathroom, toilet, the throne, the john, crap, bm, bowel movement, butt

I sat down on the toilet and watched an hour tv show and when it was over, my legs were so numb and weak that when I tried to get up, I collapsed to the floor. I was a crapper cripple.

by joecoolthefool April 17, 2016

cryptoburn

The loss of all of your money invested in a cryptocurrency that is shut down by the creator or financial regulators. You feel burned from losing your money and/or you were actually burned by the people who took your money. cryptocurrency, crypto, money, bitcoin, ethereum, litcoin, coinbase, bankrupt, cryptocrash, cryptoporn, cryptology, money

I should have cashed out When my crypto was it $15,000 because it has now crashed and is only worth $2000. I feel like an idiot I didn’t get out in time. Tom, you’re feeling the cryptoburn.

by joecoolthefool May 28, 2018

travel envy

The envy and jealousy one feels watching travel channel hosts go around the world to beautiful, exciting destinations and you're stuck at home on the couch. travel, travel channel, destination, exotic locations, women, rich, Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous, baller, Anthony Bourdain, Andrew Zimmern, Samantha Brown, world traveler

I got major travel envy every time I see the Hawaiian Islands on that travel network. I must keep saving, so I can go before I die.

by joecoolthefool June 13, 2016

Car cuddle

The weird tendency for people to all park next to each other even when the entire parking lot is empty and there is plenty of space to spread out. park, parking, car, truck, parking lot, huddle, cuddle, crowd, cluster

Every time I go to the gym, I park far away from the entrance and yet everyone parks their car next to mine. People like to car cuddle.

by joecoolthefool March 2, 2017

Probing emotions

The effort journalists and tv hosts make to get the people they interview to cry on camera. The emotional response gets media attention and drives ratings. emotion, crying, drama, if it bleeds it leads, media, journalism, soap opera, bating, interview

I get so sick of these tv hosts trying to get natural disaster victims to cry about the loss of their homes. It's so opportunistic and disgusting, this probing emotions crap is just wrong-this is what journalism has become.

by joecoolthefool June 15, 2016

poliorigami

1) noun-A politician who bends, folds and contorts himself/herself on issues in order to be appeal to the largest number of voters to win an election.

2) verb-The act of bending and contorting on political and socioeconomic issues in order to appeal to the largest number of voters to win an election. politician, Democrat, Republican, political party, DC, drain the swamp, Congress, President, origami, Trump, Obama, Clinton, Big Tent Party, Washington DC

I get so tired of these DC politicians engaging in poliorigami in order to get votes for the midterm elections.

by joecoolthefool February 15, 2018

twiit

A tweet that is so stupid, ignorant or offensive that you question the intelligence or sanity of the person who posted it.

I was scrolling through some new tweets and came upon a twiit about women needing to stay in their place. I was initially angry, but realized the twiit came from a real twit.

by joecoolthefool October 6, 2017