Definitions by jamspoon

holding my clutch rod 

When a young lady's glove box is overflowing and she is in need of assistance

I ended up holding my clutch rod at the side of a motorway

holding my clutch rod by jamspoon December 18, 2015

RTFI 

Read the fucking instructions.

Next time I assemble flat pack furniture I'll RTFI

RTFI by jamspoon January 6, 2009

carbon fartprint 

That part of a person's carbon footprint caused by gaseous bodily emissions.

1. A moose has a carbon fartprint equivalent to a small car.

2. Despite their higher personal contribution vegetarians have a lower carbon fartprint than meat eaters as cows produce huge quantities of methane.

carbon fartprint by jamspoon September 18, 2007

AIG 

Derogatory name for an Manchester United fan. The word is usually capitalised.

eg "Look at that AIG in his new home shirt."

AIG by jamspoon April 24, 2006