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ihatebuffering's definitions

poopstache

A thin, weak, fine collection of hairs on the upper lip that is noticible but not technically thick enough to be considered a real moustache. They are usually found on pubescent boys aged 13 to 16 whose moms won't buy them razors.
Mom i know i'm only 14, but i seriously need a razor. I have a poopstache, for christ's sake!
by ihatebuffering March 21, 2011
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jellyfish handjob

A move used by inexperienced teen girls. Instead of gripping the shaft like they should, the girl instead just uses the ends of her fingers on the tip, so that her hand looks similar to a swimming jellyfish.
My fifteen year old girlfriend just gave me a jellyfish handjob. I told her if she doesn't grip it next time, mr. backhand comes out
by ihatebuffering March 21, 2011
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peeping richard

Penis trick (which can only be performed by a circumcised male) in which an individual pushes the head of his penis into the ring of foreskin underneath the head (the Tweed Ring) until it can no longer be seen. The individual then lets go of his penis, causing the head to slowly reappear and return to its original position.
Larry showed me how to do the peeping richard today.
by ihatebuffering January 20, 2011
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running man

When a person is walking by, moves their fingers to simulate a person walking (as if your entire hand was a person and your pointer and middle finger are the legs), and rudely shoves it into the unsuspecting ass of a passerby.
I'm getting sued by my boss because i gave her the running man at work.
by ihatebuffering March 20, 2011
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anchorage steamer

The act of criticizing or reprimanding an action, while at the very same time performing the same action. (As noted by Jon Stewart on The Daily Show)
Sarah Palin, in an interview with Sean Hannity, criticized those on the left for placing blame on her demeanor for influencing the Tucson shooter, then in the same interview described the shooter as "left-leaning." This is a textbook anchorage steamer
by ihatebuffering January 21, 2011
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pedophile van

A large, older van, typically brown or white in color, and often with tinted front windows and no windows in the back. Not all pedophile vans are used for the purpose of luring young children to kidnap with promises of candy or toys, but if somebody were to decide they wanted to do this, a pedophile van would be the perfect vehicle.
My friend just bought a total pedophile van. Either he is a rapist or has very poor choices in vehicles.
by ihatebuffering March 21, 2011
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The Turkey

The act of a man, weraing boxers, pulling his penis up and tucking it into the waistband of his boxers so that only the head is showing and is pinned against his abdomen by the boxers' waistband, then pulling his balls out of the front of his boxers, thus simulating the neck and frill of a turkey. This trick is closely related to The Mongoose.
My friends were both enthused and horrified when i did The Turkey in front of them.
by ihatebuffering January 21, 2011
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