hoze's definitions

trailer

A place to take your secretary at lunch.

¿Ño, Enrique -- can I borrow your trailer again, por fa-fucking-vor?

by hoze November 23, 2003

God

A clever old Jewish bastard who gets credit for all the good stuff, but eludes the blame for all the bad shit.

"When the tornado blew our trailer all the way to Pascagoula, thank God none of us was killed." WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK FUCKED UP YOUR TRAILER, YOU STUPID CRACKER-ASS BITCH???????????

by Hoze April 23, 2004

Ducati

A motorcycle sought out by pretentious assholes who prefer wine to Jack Daniels. They hope that the Ducati is a conspicuous indicator of their riding ability along with their Victoria's Secret color coordinated soft leather suits. Unfortunately, the Duc, on the rare instances it will run, is a badge and incident of a lame ass pretender who knows absolutely nothing about motorcyles. They are made by a filthy subspecies of European -- the only ones on the continent who admired the fucking Nazi's.

A gay bar is to a Ducati like a bright light is to a bug.

by Hoze December 17, 2004

Richard Gere

When Hollywood wants to make yet another chick flick and doesn't want to pay for talent (why would you in a chick flick) Gere's name comes right up.

Director Hoib Goldbaum: "Say, lets make a movie with a mindless plot with shameless exploitation of every human emotion, depicting a lapdog husband under the control of a beautiful middle aged soccer mom who dresses well and has suspicously young children with fake southern accents."

Producer Sol Horowitz: "So you don't think Gere's already working?"

Goldbaum: "Working? Yeah, he's working with a gerbil!"

by Hoze December 25, 2004

finger

Digits of the human hand that during courtship (with any luck) small lkie fish.

Knock-knock. "Who's there?" Wilma. "Wilma who?" Wilma finger do until I get my pants off.

by hoze October 25, 2004

Toyota

A support system for a stainless steel exhaust tip for those who have micro dicks. A cramped little shitbox with a 5cc sewing machine motor. Something to bolt a grocery cart handle to while the zit faced asslick behind the wheel pretends that it's a spoiler.

I think I just squashed another Toyota.

by Hoze April 10, 2006

DUI

(Dee'-you-aye) mod english, punctuation omitted, n., 1) a substiute for a powerful sports car; 2) substitute for racing lessons; 3) a driving technique, esp., for middle aged white men who "drive better drunk than most people do sober" that is useful in getting home before the wife figures out that you're porking the secretary.

One the forth DUI, you might get to be some niggaz bitch!

by Hoze April 24, 2004