honneamise's definitions

Touched the gay deodorant

When walking the aisles of the supermarket, a man who goes to the wrong section of the deodorant aisle, the gay section, and subsequently touches the gay deodorant causes the aforementioned man to become a raging homosexual. By the time the formerly straight male makes it to the end of the aisle, to realise their mistake, they will be speaking with a gay lisp, dreaming of smoking pole and being slammed in the arse by eight giant prison homos and dressing in tight pants with the arse missing.

There goes Colin, he touched the gay deodorant
I know a guy called Colin and he touched the gay deodorant and now he likes being slammed in the arse by massive homos in back alleys

by honneamise March 29, 2021

stupiditis

A serious illness contracted by those of the world with an inability to add up numbers without reverting to completely ridiculous attempts at mathematics. It has become apparent that Stupiditis is spreading and the world is covered in sufferers of this illness and they should all be put down like the mentally challenged sad bags they are.

That guy has Stupiditis
Pretty sure 2+2 is still 4, damn your Stupiditis is bad
How come when you open your mouth, it sounds like Stupiditis is coming out?

by honneamise November 26, 2018

nerdaism

Nerdaism is the religion of Nerds. It was recently formed by Nerds to formalise their belief that the world will be saved by Nerds when the Nerdocalypse happens. the Nerdocalypse is similar to the Rapture, except Nerds will appear everywhere all of a sudden quoting Linux commands and sprouting off about "the command line is power", when in actual fact normals (people who arent Nerds) simply want to go about their business, like going to the coffee shop and swimming. Fortunately for normals, the Nerdocalypse will simply produce a lot of Nerds, and normals will have no problem sweeping them aside, as Nerds are weak and pathetic.

Nerdaism is a great religion
If you are a Nerdasim member, you shoul die from a terminal disease

by honneamise December 18, 2018

adocd

The effect that happens to network and system administrators when they arrive at a workplace and find that someone with smuna or semen syndrome has been running the place. Inevitably DNS settings are incorrect and the offenders should be jailed, beaten by random inmates with a grudge against nerds and they should then be infected with intentional food poisoning. All people who cause ADOCD should be shot.

My ADOCD went mad as after I started looking at yet another DC with the wrong settings
If I find one more network that sets off my ADOCD, I'm going to go Joelstal on their arse

by honneamise July 21, 2020

imds

IMDS or Internal Motion Dynamics in Security is a descriptive acronym, defined as the North-South and East-West traversal of data in a network when compromised by a hacker (someone who has smuna). Recently a large sports device manufacturer was hacked by a smuna sufferer and the hacker deployed retarded semen syndrome into the network, utilising IMDS techniques. It is clear that the person who coined the North-South and East-West paradigms, rather than the correct acronym, suffers from smuna as well and should be shot.

We have been hacked, deploy the anti IMDS beacon!
When we tested cracking our network, it turned out that IMDS techniques could be used to inject retarded semen syndrome into the network

by honneamise May 20, 2024

nah mate see ya

An exit interview strategy applied to employers who are mentally handicapped and require assistance understanding the basics of people management. While exiting a companies employ, you should employ the “Nah mate, see ya” as your exit interview strategy. A standard exit interview interaction would go along these lines:

Receptionist: “What are you doing here?”
You: “Dropping my stuff off”
Boss: “Can we have a chat please?”
You: “Nah mate, see ya”
Mic drop, exit front door

I gave my old boss a bit of the old “Nah mate see ya”
“Can we talk about this please?”, “Nah mate, see ya”

by honneamise September 5, 2021

COVAIDS-20

COVAIDS-20 is a new strain of the recently released COViD-19 disease, which was formulated by a monkey, bat and human threesome, which then had a baby, a ManBatMonkey. This ManBatMonkey was then summarily caught, caged, sold and slaughtered in a Chinese wet market, because they could. The resulting illness spread faster than anything before it, but it was much more lethal than COViD-19, as it instantly turned people who contracted the illness gay and they had a burning desire to cross breed with animals. There is no known cure, except this disease has only affected stupid people, so only about 80% of the worlds population will be affected by the disease

There goes hat guy with COVAIDS-20 and his conclave of animals the sick, dirty, horrible, sweaty mongoloid
If I contracted COVAIDS-20, I would kill myself, because I'd be gay AND into bestiality

by honneamise April 14, 2020