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All Round Pressure Club

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The All Round Pressure Club is an exclusive fraternity enjoyed by gentlemen who have their Brown Wings.

The name is derived from the continuous circle of pressure applied by the human anal sphincter which is quite distinct from that of the vagina which, particularly for ladies with a fair amount of wear and tear, has a distinctive H shaped channel which unhelpfully expands as stimulation proceeds.
Lew: Hey Jerry that was some fucking row coming from your apartment last night. I thought someone was being murdered. What the fuck was going on?
Jerry: I got me brown wings, fella. There was collateral damage.
Lew: Get in. Another member of the All Round Pressure Club.

"Elementary my Dear Watson", said Holmes, "the suspect's carefree demeanour, hearty appetite and cheerful countenance merely serves to confirm my suspicion that he is a fully paid up member of the All Round Pressure Club" - Sherlock Holmes and the Case of the Pummeled Hoop.
by goody5 December 10, 2010
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Gay Level

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In the UK, children aged 18 and competing for university places take exams called 'A' levels. Some subjects such as Maths and Physics are generally quite Hard, while other subjects such as Sociology and Media Studies are generally quite Easy.

The kids who are too lazy to get a job but who nevertheless still want to bum on the taxpayer for a couple of years without actually wanting to do any proper work do the Easy 'A' Levels, or 'Gay' Levels.

The others become dentists.
So, Steven what did you get in your exams?
Chemistry A, Physics B and Maths B.
Wow thats pretty impressive. How about you Samantha?
Sociology D and Media Studies E.
Ha ha. Samantha did fucking Gay Levels. (makes L shape on forehead to show how lame Samantha is).
by goody5 December 10, 2010
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Monk's Sleeve

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Noun. A term generally used in conjunction with a comparison to a vagina, in particular one with voluminous labia majora.
God bless us, your Majesty, I am nonplussed, nay dismayed to discover that thou has a clout like a Monk's Sleeve.
by goody5 December 7, 2010
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Byut

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Russian version of "bot", which in turn describes the act of fellatio.
Hey Ivan, how did it go last night with Olga?

It was awesome, Comrade, I spent the whole evening listening to her go 'byut'
by goody5 December 7, 2010
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Burst Balloon

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Noun, describing the appearance of an anus after a lengthy and/or violent period of abuse from fingers, penises, dildos, broom handles, what-have-you.
Quentin's gait was as that of a penguin that morning after his initiation. When questioned by friends he confided that he had spent the evening being buggered senseless by the Green Bay Packers with the inevitable result of his asshole now looked like a Burst Balloon.
by goody5 December 7, 2010
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Cock au Van

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A sexual encounter that has occurred in the rear (or the front, if the participants are especially limber) of some motorised vehicle, for example a van, truck, estate car or station wagon.

Can also relate to sexual favours offered by a hitch hiker to one who offers a lengthy ride with minimal questions asked.

Can also relate to sexual favours delivered by a prostitute to a John.
Hey Darlin. Do you like cock au van? I'll bring the cock if you'll bring the fucking van. Ho Ho Ho.

Oi Gary, get the car keys, I'm gagging for a spot of the old Cock au Van.

Listen lads, I need to use the company vehicle this weekend. Ive promised Rita from the the sweet shop a bit of Cock au Van.
by goody5 December 7, 2010
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