my five friends

Referring to the five fingers of the human hand that clench to a fist during exigent situations. Sometimes the only friends you'll have in more dire instances. Note: this phrase is usually reserved for those who maintain one particularly strong arm while the other is relatively weak.

Me and my five friends took on four dudes.

by friend of bob June 15, 2004

bad pickup lines

Speech device primarily employed by two factions of mankind: the truly pathetic and amateur comedians. Origins have been disputed, but it is widely thought that pickup lines, once upon a magical time, could win pussy if chanted with remarkable charisma and authenticity. Thanks to the combination of inevitability and human stupidity, pickup lines degraded into verses that invoke either uproarious laughter or further inalienation, but not the throes of sex.

Got a library card? Because I'm checking you out.

I scraped my knees falling for you.

You're like a box of Lucky Charms: you're magically delicious.

Got a gym card? Because you've been giving my mind a workout.

I lost my number. Can I have yours?

You sound tired. Wanna sleep with me?

Hey there. (use Clint Eastwood impression)

by friend of bob June 15, 2004

Halo 2

Something that abruptly halted any interest in the outside world. In this game, I saw a balance so pure it erased all meaning of many things I once considered significant. This game has now become my world.

Call me a loser. Tell me I have no life. I'll show you how much I care.

Halo 2 is awesome.

by friend of bob October 04, 2005

MTV

A deadly and evil entity capable of emitting powerful waves of superficiality that can reduce a teenager's brain mass into excrement in mere seconds. Disguises nefarious intentions of gaining wealth from the idiotic with incessant marketing/brainwashing. Research has shown that 98 percent of MTV's audience exhibit an IQ below that of a rotting corpse. Experts recommend immediate evasion of anything affiliated with MTV, including its viewers. Many a douchebag has been manufactured via watching MTV. Females hooked on MTV usually prefer to mate with douchebags rather than humans. The music shown on MTV represents the lowest grade of musical quality existing anywhere on Earth, possibly even the universe.

The solution to MTV? None. Let other people watch it so they can become dumber than you.

by friend of bob May 15, 2004

Wal-Mart

A nationwide supermarket chain generally distinguished for their lower-income clientele and ridiculous amounts of shopping carts scattered haphazardly across the parking lot, as if the cart-pushers are paid to loaf around.

Once upon a time, I was retarded, and decided upon heading to Wal-Mart's for the exclusive reason of attaining some pussy. I was more than sadly disappointed.

by friend of bob July 17, 2004

Neutral Milk Hotel

Concisely speaking, a very good band on the "lighter" side of things...

Neutral Milk Hotel.

by friend of bob May 17, 2004

virgin queen

A particular chess piece (the Queen) which remains untouched at the end of a game.

I was a beat by an opponent with a virgin queen.

by friend of bob July 14, 2004