falsetokaiba's definitions

He a little confused but he got the spirit

A quote from American sitcom The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air which has since become a meme response to when someone has apparently tried to do something positive or well-intentioned, but with little success or while failing to entirely understand the thing they are trying to support.

Social media post: let's not send our navy seals into another pointless conflict!
Reply: yes, war is barbaric, and just look at their cute little whiskers!
Person: he a little confused but he got the spirit

by falsetokaiba May 24, 2021

noodle hair Ronaldo

The incarnation of Portuguese footballer Cristiano Ronaldo in the mid-to-late 2010s, referring to the frosted tips hairstyle he was sporting at the time. It was a period of particular success for Ronaldo, winning the Ballon d'Or several times as well as successive Champions League titles with Real Madrid and the UEFA European Championships 2016 with Portugal.

When you saw noodle hair Ronaldo, you knew the game was over before it had even started.

by falsetokaiba February 12, 2022

Row Z

The theoretical furthest back row of seats in a football stadium, and thus, where a defender making a clearance is encouraged to aim for, to eliminate any immediate threat of the opposition scoring by sending the ball as far from their own goal as possible.

A good defender should know how to pass a ball, but more importantly, they should know when to kick it into Row Z.

by falsetokaiba April 22, 2019

Scummy Mummy

Aspires to be that kind of young, trendy, active mother on social media, but fails horrifically in all regards. Their regular posts, largely shared from other sources, include how all models are actually ugly without PhotoShop, prize competitions to win holidays to Ibiza, scare stories about people giving out Halloween candy that's secretly drugs and conspiracy theories about Madeleine McCann, as well as horror stories contributed by other Scummy Mummies of things to happen to their children, with captions such as 'If sum1 did that to my wee Beyonce I'd flippin rek them, hnnnnng.'

A typical scummy mummy will spend several hours a day applying make-up, before posting to Facebook that real men like real women and not fake ones like Kate Upton.

by falsetokaiba May 3, 2019

Theoretical Thottery

When someone is very promiscuous in theory, but not in practice. They share posts frequently on social media about being freaky, sucking dick and not being able to keep track of all their sexual conquests, but do not engage in any sexual activity in real life.

"Megan's sure been sharing a lot of posts recently about raw-dogging. Did something happen that I missed?"
"Nah, it's just theoretical thottery."

by falsetokaiba August 23, 2020

Courtly love

Romantic love meant to be of a purer and more intellectual nature in which a male, typically a knight, pursues a noble female in a chivalrous manner and accomplishes great deeds to woo her; the concept was often represented in medieval Western European art and literature. Not to be confused with Courtney Love, former lead vocalist of American rock band Hole and widow of Kurt Cobain.

The hangover of courtly love's idealisation of women has been both a help and a hindrance to feminism in the modern world.

by falsetokaiba September 11, 2019

The Spice Boys

The term given to the core of young British players that played for Liverpool FC in the 1990s. Coined mainly as a derogatory term, it mocked the players' underachievement in winning trophies compared to the team of the previous decade, seen as a byproduct of their laddish behaviour and laissez-faire attitude to the game, such as the occasion they paraded the pitch before the 1996 FA Cup Final in Armani cream suits, and subsequently lost to rivals Manchester United. Since then, the term has also become a general slang term for garishly metrosexual young men, though it has largely slipped out of the common vernacular with 'fuckboys' being a more common modern alterntive.

If The Spice Boys had spent less time snorting lines and shagging strippers and more time training they might have actually won a league title.

by falsetokaiba March 1, 2019