77 definitions by earpuller

American film actress, known for her work in such films as "The French Lieutenant's Ewe," "Lambchop's Choice," "Fleecewood," "Sheep-Devil" (also starring Roseanne Baah,) and her current film, "The Wolf Wears Prada."
In her long and illustrious career, Meryl Sheep's only regret is not getting the role of Clarice Starling in "Silence of the Lambs."
by earpuller July 7, 2006
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1. one who engages in sexual activities on public transport, especially on trains in the chicagoland area.
2. one who gets all wet thinking about trains, especially commuter trains in chicago.
3. how a southern gentleman might pronounce "metrosexual."
1. hey guys, kelly blew me while we were riding home to fox lake on the train. maybe she'll fuck me if we ride the elgin line!!
2. ohmigod, i almost missed the 5:35 westbound to aurora.....wait, here it comes....ohhhh..... ooooooohhhh....... aaahhhhhhh. that was great.
3. son, what in hail do you mean, "ah'm a metrasexual, grampa?" does that mean yer one a those nancy boys from new york city?
by earpuller April 14, 2006
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noun: a very small penis. Often used as a general putdown for males who actually have normal or even large peckers.
ed: hey dude, i heard you need tweezers to jack off.
fred: yeah, that girl you tried to screw last week told all her friends she needed a magnifying glass just to see if you were hard!
ted: and so, you have been revealed as the possessor of a midget digit!!
ned: damn! oh well, good thing my tongue is as long as my arm!!

by earpuller September 23, 2005
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having many or all of the characteristics of one of the famous Kardashian sisters (how come we never hear about the unfamous Kardashian sisters?) These include well-oversized posteriors, excessive use of eye makeup, black hair that surely came from a bottle, and a vocal quality that makes Fran Drescher sound like an accomplished Broadway actress.
tony: hey, did you see the new receptionist? big ole' butt, and racoon eyes.
donie: and that voice! she sounds all kardash, like those sisters on TV.....what was their name again?
tony: you mean the Kardashians? that's the name you can't remember. how kardash of you.
donie: yeah. speaking of kardash, what kind of printers' ink does your mom use to keep her youthful appearance?
by earpuller December 6, 2010
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similar to naughty little rhymes (if this wasn't published, just follow along,) naughty haiku uses the classic japanese poem structure combined with good old American sex-obsession to create a new art form. The form of a haiku is always as follows-
first line=five syllables
second line=seven syllables
third line=five syllables
-so now just add some semi-pornographic, naughty, or just silly ideas, and voila! naughty haiku!
here some examples of naughty haiku-

her bosom heaving,
jiggling, as she runs away
from me, down the road.

sometimes i stare out
from my window, watching her
as she trims her bush.

gee, i didn't know
she was only fifteen, sir.
off to jail with me.

the couple wriggled
and writhed, moaning in passion;
then the tape ran out.
by earpuller July 16, 2006
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simply put, boring neighbors. people who think you really care about their lives when, in fact, you wish you could move somewhere far, far away just to get away from them.
lady next door:.....then she said.....just back from visiting my sister in Peoria.....couldn't find a thing in there.....new recipes for hamburger helper.....never buy a german car, my father always said.....(two hours later).....well, i can't stand here talking all day.....(another hour later).....wait, don't you want to see my niece's picture?
me: maybe some other time. i've got to go in now (escaping to the safety of my own apartment, i close and lock the door, and start looking through the rental ads-do they list apartments under "no neighbores allowed?)
by earpuller June 7, 2006
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another way of saying butterface, referring to someone who is 8/9ths perfect, but the uppermost 1/9th is a killer. one can say "nnd" for short.
you see her standing on line, waiting to check out. expensive high-heel FMs, tan hose, long slender legs, perfect heart-shaped butt, gently curving hips, slim waist, large firm breasts, elegant neck. the ideal woman.........and then she turns toward you........and has a face like the dark side of the moon. oh well, they all look the same with the lights out. this is the essence of nice from the neck down.
by earpuller November 8, 2005
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