dirtyjeff's definitions

Piss Bandit

A thief who steals the wallet out of his victims' back pocket, while the victim is using a urinal in a public restroom.

Phil: "Man, my wallet was just stolen in the men's room!
Chris: "Dude, you really gotta watch out for those Piss Bandits.

by dirtyjeff March 26, 2009

berry basket

Simply a scrotum, nutsack, etc.

I shaved my berry basket on Tuesday and now it itches.

by dirtyjeff March 16, 2008

pissboarding

A form of torture, similar to waterboarding, that influences compliance of a prisoner by subjecting them to the simulated experience of drowning. The interrogation subject is restrained and a sheet of fabric is wrapped over their face. Then, between 4 and 10 men simultaneously urinate on the prisoners face, which induces gagging and vomiting almost immediately. The prisoner typically begs to be executed after 3-4 seconds of pissboarding. Prisoners subjected to pissboarding often have mental scars that last a lifetime.

Chris: "Did the pissboarding get him to confess?"
Ed: "Who fuckin' cares? I've got another 12 beers to drink."

by dirtyjeff June 11, 2008

Fogo de Jew

A Brazilian Steakhouse that serves only Kosher meats.

We were going to go to Fogo de Chao but Phil got bent out of shape because he's jewish and can't eat any pork. He insisted that we go to Fogo de Jew instead.

by dirtyjeff March 26, 2009

Snatchmo

An incredibly talented, female trumpet player, approaching the level of Louis "Satchmo" Armstrong.

That girl can really play the horn. She's a regular Snatchmo.

by dirtyjeff March 16, 2008

Hillarectum

An unpleasant medical condition where shit keeps leaking out your ass, similar to the way it constantly flows out of Hillary Clinton's mouth.

Phil: "Dude, something stinks!"
Jeff: "Yeah, I have a case of Hillarectum. Sorry 'bout the smell."
Phil: "Maybe you should get an Obama to take care of that."

by dirtyjeff June 10, 2008

Rice

A derogatory term, referring to Asian males who modify old economy cars to make them louder and slower, in an attempt to look cool and compensate for their miniscule penises. The true result of these efforts is that the loud car draws attention to the fact that they’re an idiot, with a slow, loud car and a tiny penis.

The term “rice” is slang for “rice dick”, which itself originates from the fact that the typical Asian male has a penis that’s no larger than a single grain of rice.

R.I.C.E. is also considered to be an acronym for Really Infinitesimal Cock Exhibition.

Phil: "Oh my god! That fuckin’ idiot cut the muffler off his 1991 Civic and taped a trash can lid to the roof to act as a spoiler."
Mark: "Stupid fuckin’ Rice."

by dirtyjeff June 12, 2008