cut the cards's definitions

card trick

When you run a playing card through your crack then give somebody the business with it.

Greg: I gave my girlfriend the card trick when she fell asleep last night. She was mad, it woke her up out of a dead sleep when I waved it under her nose. She deserved it though.

by cut the cards August 3, 2022

slackerdrive

Drive your man all around town and pay for the car, gas, insurance, etc. especially when out of henny and weed.

Julie: Where to next baby ?

De'Vontleroy: I tolds you !
Julie: Sorry. Want to swing through Popeyes or KFC too as I slackerdrive ?

by cut the cards December 27, 2022

reeking around the Christmas tree

Relatives that wear old reeking sweaters that smell like cigarettes.

Mabel: How do you like my vintage Christmas sweater I have not washed for decades ?

Junior: It's nice.

Mabel: I am taking a smoke break I will be right back. We will be reeking around the Christmas tree soon.
Junior: Thanks for the warning.

by cut the cards December 19, 2022

mop up

To have to rewipe one's ass a few hours after a shit.

Mike: I need to go mop up it's so hot in this warehouse riding this forklift around.

Boss: Make it fast, we don't have all day.

by cut the cards August 8, 2022

take your breath away

A chick with really bad breath that is beautiful.

Roger: See that gal across the room ?

Harvey: Yes, she takes my breath away.

Roger: You got that right. She will take your breath away. I hired her to peel wallpaper in my bathroom with it.

by cut the cards February 23, 2023

jiffy pop

Ilhan Omars turban

Abdul: I see they took Ilhan Omar off the Foreign Affairs Committee.

Bill: Yes, poor jiffy pop head.

by cut the cards March 26, 2023

landing pad

Bald spot

Jill: There's a Chinese balloon headed our way.

Joe: No worries, I will go down on the beach and flash the landing pad for it to land on.

Jill: Good idea. Maybe it is dropping off our cash too.

by cut the cards February 5, 2023