10 definitions by cockdriller
To drill a hole through someone's temple in their skull with your penis, and then proceed to fuck their brain.
Jeremy: Hey Beth, how did you enjoy being Yao Minged?
Beth:......
Jeremy: Yeah, I leave bitches speechless
Beth:......
Jeremy: Yeah, I leave bitches speechless
by cockdriller March 2, 2010
A sexual act that occurs when person A shits into a clarinet, lights it on fire, and forcible inserts it into the anus or vagina of person B. This is not a sexual act for the faint of heart.
Becky: Ohhhhh, baby, give me that flaming clarinet!
Ryan: I don't know, I just pooped. I don't think I can squeeze one out right now.
Becky: It's fine. I just ate Taco Bell; the poop is flowing like the Rio Grande!
Ryan: I don't know, I just pooped. I don't think I can squeeze one out right now.
Becky: It's fine. I just ate Taco Bell; the poop is flowing like the Rio Grande!
by cockdriller August 11, 2010
The Owen Wilson is a celebrity inspired sexual position, doable by any number of people or genders. It requires one person to be kneeling on the ground in a blow job position, while the other person inserts an ass-to-ass dildo within their rectum. With the remaining length of the dildo, the person then spins around and slaps the kneeling individual, then jams the dildo through their eye.
This is also known as the Brazilian Wax Attack or the "Anal-Eyeball-Rape."
This is also known as the Brazilian Wax Attack or the "Anal-Eyeball-Rape."
Joe-Beth: Did you hear!? Did you hear?!
Papi: No, what Joe-Beth?
Joe-Beth: Father Thomas was excommunicated for pulling an Owen Wilson on three choir boys...
Papi: Mary, Jesus and Joseph! I hope you didn't wax them afterwards...
Papi: No, what Joe-Beth?
Joe-Beth: Father Thomas was excommunicated for pulling an Owen Wilson on three choir boys...
Papi: Mary, Jesus and Joseph! I hope you didn't wax them afterwards...
by cockdriller March 11, 2010
The Shaquille O'Neal is a sexual maneuver done while receiving a blowjob. When about to climax, the man should proceed to force the woman's head down with such intensity that his penis goes through the roof of her mouth and out the back of her skull. Essentially, 'slam dunking' her head like the object of extracurricular enjoyment that it is.
*Warning, do not actually attempt the Shaquille O'Neal, as it will result in death*
*Warning, do not actually attempt the Shaquille O'Neal, as it will result in death*
Tyrone: Did you hear!?
Jamaal: What ma nigga?
Tyrone: OJ is on trial again. Turns out he murdered another one of his bitches, this time by Shaquille O'Nealing her.
Jamaal: Oh shit! That crazy fucka neva learns!
Jamaal: What ma nigga?
Tyrone: OJ is on trial again. Turns out he murdered another one of his bitches, this time by Shaquille O'Nealing her.
Jamaal: Oh shit! That crazy fucka neva learns!
by cockdriller November 17, 2010
Sam: So how was the party last night?
Danny: It was okay, I went home early because there weren't enough bitches.
Sam: Did you crysturbate when you got home?
Danny: Yeah, it was a JOPO.
Danny: It was okay, I went home early because there weren't enough bitches.
Sam: Did you crysturbate when you got home?
Danny: Yeah, it was a JOPO.
by cockdriller August 7, 2010
A sexual position. A man or woman coats their hand and forearm with napalm, and then sets it alight. After this they then yell out "FALCON FIST!!!!" and proceed to fist a female in her vagina. She must be a firecrotch, or this could become dangerous.
Peter Parker: Yo, I totally Falcon Fisted MJ last night!
Harry: No way! Do the carpets match the drapes?
Peter: Yeah, luckily...if she wasn't a firecrotch she could have been pretty badly burned.
Harry: No way! Do the carpets match the drapes?
Peter: Yeah, luckily...if she wasn't a firecrotch she could have been pretty badly burned.
by cockdriller April 6, 2010
A Zoidberg is when a friend gives you a hand job with a crab. He/she positions the crabs claw around your penis, and the friend then jerks the crab up and down. In essence, the Zoidberg is a dutch-rudder via crab claw.
Professor Farnsworth: "Good news everybody! I just got a Zoidberg!"
Fry: "Ewww, you let him touch you?"
Professor Farnsworth: "Good God no! I had Bubble Gum fondle me through half a fiddler crab."
Fry: "Ewww, you let him touch you?"
Professor Farnsworth: "Good God no! I had Bubble Gum fondle me through half a fiddler crab."
by cockdriller April 18, 2010