10 definitions by Cockdriller
A sexual act that occurs when person A shits into a clarinet, lights it on fire, and forcible inserts it into the anus or vagina of person B. This is not a sexual act for the faint of heart.
Becky: Ohhhhh, baby, give me that flaming clarinet!
Ryan: I don't know, I just pooped. I don't think I can squeeze one out right now.
Becky: It's fine. I just ate Taco Bell; the poop is flowing like the Rio Grande!
Ryan: I don't know, I just pooped. I don't think I can squeeze one out right now.
Becky: It's fine. I just ate Taco Bell; the poop is flowing like the Rio Grande!
by Cockdriller August 11, 2010
The Owen Wilson is a celebrity inspired sexual position, doable by any number of people or genders. It requires one person to be kneeling on the ground in a blow job position, while the other person inserts an ass-to-ass dildo within their rectum. With the remaining length of the dildo, the person then spins around and slaps the kneeling individual, then jams the dildo through their eye.
This is also known as the Brazilian Wax Attack or the "Anal-Eyeball-Rape."
This is also known as the Brazilian Wax Attack or the "Anal-Eyeball-Rape."
Joe-Beth: Did you hear!? Did you hear?!
Papi: No, what Joe-Beth?
Joe-Beth: Father Thomas was excommunicated for pulling an Owen Wilson on three choir boys...
Papi: Mary, Jesus and Joseph! I hope you didn't wax them afterwards...
Papi: No, what Joe-Beth?
Joe-Beth: Father Thomas was excommunicated for pulling an Owen Wilson on three choir boys...
Papi: Mary, Jesus and Joseph! I hope you didn't wax them afterwards...
by Cockdriller March 11, 2010
The Shaquille O'Neal is a sexual maneuver done while receiving a blowjob. When about to climax, the man should proceed to force the woman's head down with such intensity that his penis goes through the roof of her mouth and out the back of her skull. Essentially, 'slam dunking' her head like the object of extracurricular enjoyment that it is.
*Warning, do not actually attempt the Shaquille O'Neal, as it will result in death*
*Warning, do not actually attempt the Shaquille O'Neal, as it will result in death*
Tyrone: Did you hear!?
Jamaal: What ma nigga?
Tyrone: OJ is on trial again. Turns out he murdered another one of his bitches, this time by Shaquille O'Nealing her.
Jamaal: Oh shit! That crazy fucka neva learns!
Jamaal: What ma nigga?
Tyrone: OJ is on trial again. Turns out he murdered another one of his bitches, this time by Shaquille O'Nealing her.
Jamaal: Oh shit! That crazy fucka neva learns!
by Cockdriller November 17, 2010
Sam: So how was the party last night?
Danny: It was okay, I went home early because there weren't enough bitches.
Sam: Did you crysturbate when you got home?
Danny: Yeah, it was a JOPO.
Danny: It was okay, I went home early because there weren't enough bitches.
Sam: Did you crysturbate when you got home?
Danny: Yeah, it was a JOPO.
by Cockdriller August 7, 2010
To drill a hole through someone's temple in their skull with your penis, and then proceed to fuck their brain.
Jeremy: Hey Beth, how did you enjoy being Yao Minged?
Beth:......
Jeremy: Yeah, I leave bitches speechless
Beth:......
Jeremy: Yeah, I leave bitches speechless
by Cockdriller March 2, 2010
Similar to the dutch rudder, where person A takes person B's arm and manipulates the hand to masturbate person A.
Bartok: So, I dont want this to be gay or anything, but could you perhaps give me a dutch rudder??
Denes: Dutch Rudder! Fuck the Dutch! I will Magyar Oar you until your penis resembles a magpie! Now give me your dick!
Bartok: Ooooh yeaaaaah.
Denes: Dutch Rudder! Fuck the Dutch! I will Magyar Oar you until your penis resembles a magpie! Now give me your dick!
Bartok: Ooooh yeaaaaah.
by Cockdriller August 3, 2010
To beat someone unconscious with a bust of a penis, and then proceed to sodomize them with a telescope.
It is essentially a sexual position - of course done consensually - that is a montage of Stanley Kubrick's movies.
It is essentially a sexual position - of course done consensually - that is a montage of Stanley Kubrick's movies.
Alex: Okay my droogies, now here was the lowdown...I met this fine yenta outside the Korova Milkbar, and I broke the fourth wall by Stanley Kubricking her.
by Cockdriller March 11, 2010