1. A person in authority who callously ignores the suffering of others, instead using his power and position to completely escape the treacherous situation.
2. Anyone who abandons their responsibilities for the welfare of others in favor of hedonistic escapism.
Cancun Cruz: “Let my fellow Texans freeze to death....I’m going to the beach!”
“Did Dad leave the faucets dripping and bring the pets inside before the storm?”
“Hell no, sis. He pulled a Cancun Cruz and went to Uncle Ned’s house to drink and play poker instead.”
Referencing the Bible in an attempt to justify actions that are heinous and ungodly.
Amy: I just heard a politician on television say that the Bible justifies separating children from their mothers at the border. What BS!
Juan: Seriously? I bet God really hates it when people try to Bible bootstrap their own evil ideas to the good book.
Buy a
Bible Bootstrap
mug!
Wow I’m really freaked out about this whole Coronavirus thing....
Yeah I was, but then I bought a roomful of toilet paper, hand sanitizer, and bleach, so I feel much better now!
That’s not cool, you freakin’ Coronahoarder!
An
old flame you can’t help
hooking up with periodically, regardless of either person’s relationship status.
Amy: I can’t believe you slept with Adam after the class reunion. He’s engaged and you have a boyfriend!
Lola: Hey it wasn’t my fault. Adam is a pre-existing condition.
Buy a
Pre-existing condition
mug!
When you’re texting or talking on the phone to a date and you think it’s going great, but suddenly and without warning he/she just hangs up on you or blocks you.
So I was talking on the phone to Greg and I thought it was going great, but then he blindsided me and I haven’t heard from him since.
A pandemic virus invented by Millennials and Gen Zers to rid the world of Baby Boomers.
Goddamn those Baby Boomers! They’re totally fucking up our future!
If only there were a way to stop them, like a supervirus that only attacks old people.....
Yes! We can turn this virus into a Coronacoup!
