brucester's definitions

Power Fish

You have just woken up after a shag, you need a piss and you also need to get rid of the used condom still on your cock, you also need to make certain that the condom is totally disposed of.........enter the POWER FISH, holding the condom still in place you empty your bladder into it, then precisely positioning yourself so that the baloon of piss is directly over the deepest part of the pan, then let go immediatly with both hands. A 'bonus power fish' is sometimes achieved whereby the payload drops with such force that it vanishes round the U bend immediately without even flushing.

The science behind a bonus power fish is still poorly understood but may have something to do with the shape of the particular pan and also the volume of piss in the skin willie. BPF's still only account for 5% of Power Fish.

Re-enters the room....<Thinks> Fucking dynamite Power Fish.

She <thinks> wierd cunt, sounded like a power dump, I wonder if his arse is prolapsed?

by Brucester September 13, 2006

cowsh

Mendip caving slang for cow shit.

As we entered sump five we found that it was thigh deep in cowsh.

by Brucester September 16, 2006

Industrial Tribunal

Industrial Tribunal (UK) used to be a court designed to deal with the bad employers. It is now a sham, 1000s of good employers are ending up being IT'd due to 'no win - no fee solicitors' and an oppressive spiteful govenment.

We're not sure what we did wrong, it's so complicated. We spent £12k on legal fees in the run up to court. We made a mistake in our HR procedures and were fined £16k. I have now lost my house and my company. Turns out that the claimant has done this 3 times before.

Welcome to Industrial Tribunal in the UK !

by Brucester June 4, 2011

age

Pronounced 'idge' a suffix attached to almost any word. Invented in 1988. Whilst doing exhibition work we were asked to, "Go and put up the 'signage' to which we replied,
"And after that we are going to have some drinkage some clubbage and a bit of kebabage" Since then adding 'age' to the end of a word has spread impressively but now seems to be on the decline.

Kippage, drinkage, chatage, swimage etc etc

by Brucester September 10, 2006

blartkin

Farting whilst receiving a blow job.

Either by accident or on purpose.

Honey...........I was wondering.........when you give me a
BJ...why not blow instead of suck?!?....it might work.

As she blows you RASP one out. "Hey don't blow that hard,
it's not a trumpet.....now I've had a blartkin

by Brucester January 31, 2008

Gob-Wash

The act of drinking from a vessel but returning some or all of the liquid back into the vessel.

"HEY! don't Gob Wash it you filthy chav, how can we have some NOW."

"When you go up for communion, make sure that ***** is behind you, I reckon he Gob-Washes the chalice."

by Brucester September 16, 2006

grout

Alt. name for a fart. An extremely accurate onomatopoeia for a very short ripping stuccatto type fart. So accurate it follows the word exactly. GR - The rasping start, OU - the classic change in tone. T - the abrupt end as the sphincter slams shut. GR OU T

Did you hear that? Someone grouted during prayers.

by Brucester September 10, 2006