"Treasure" brought up from shipwrecks on the seabed by scuba divers.
For "Treasure" read - mainly bits of brass rubbish. For "Brought up" read - furiuosly chiseled off against the clock. For "Scuba Divers" read - thieving pikeys.
For "Seabed" read - murkey depths of cold water with visibility of two metres.
For Spidge there is a heirachy of value, disregard all gold, jewells and other fantasy land nonsense the real wreck treasure chart goes something like this:-
1= Ships bell
2= Telegraph / telemotor
3= Compass binnacle
4= Helm
5= Steam whistle
6= Nice brass Nav or deck lights
7= Portholes
8= Crockery & cutlery etc
Consolation prizes for the lower ranks of the air diving one tank numpty:-
Rubber soles from dead seamans shoes, unidentified piece of brass, crockery fragment, lead shot, hooked up fishing weights, pieces of diving equipment dropped by other novices.
All of the quality items have to be reported to the Receiver Of Wreck who finds out if you are allowed to keep the stuff. The remaining detritus is used to decorate your fireplace until you get married when the wife "accidentally" puts it out for the dustman.
For "Treasure" read - mainly bits of brass rubbish. For "Brought up" read - furiuosly chiseled off against the clock. For "Scuba Divers" read - thieving pikeys.
For "Seabed" read - murkey depths of cold water with visibility of two metres.
For Spidge there is a heirachy of value, disregard all gold, jewells and other fantasy land nonsense the real wreck treasure chart goes something like this:-
1= Ships bell
2= Telegraph / telemotor
3= Compass binnacle
4= Helm
5= Steam whistle
6= Nice brass Nav or deck lights
7= Portholes
8= Crockery & cutlery etc
Consolation prizes for the lower ranks of the air diving one tank numpty:-
Rubber soles from dead seamans shoes, unidentified piece of brass, crockery fragment, lead shot, hooked up fishing weights, pieces of diving equipment dropped by other novices.
All of the quality items have to be reported to the Receiver Of Wreck who finds out if you are allowed to keep the stuff. The remaining detritus is used to decorate your fireplace until you get married when the wife "accidentally" puts it out for the dustman.
"Dived the Lanfrac last weekend"
"Hur hur, find any gold"
"Er, yes actually! a solid bar of it, unfortunately it was a Leigh Bishop trip so in fact it had been placed there and was lead cast and sprayed gold to look like one"
"Hur hur - Fools Spidge!"
"Hur hur, find any gold"
"Er, yes actually! a solid bar of it, unfortunately it was a Leigh Bishop trip so in fact it had been placed there and was lead cast and sprayed gold to look like one"
"Hur hur - Fools Spidge!"
by Brucester June 27, 2007
You have just woken up after a shag, you need a piss and you also need to get rid of the used condom still on your cock, you also need to make certain that the condom is totally disposed of.........enter the POWER FISH, holding the condom still in place you empty your bladder into it, then precisely positioning yourself so that the baloon of piss is directly over the deepest part of the pan, then let go immediatly with both hands. A 'bonus power fish' is sometimes achieved whereby the payload drops with such force that it vanishes round the U bend immediately without even flushing.
The science behind a bonus power fish is still poorly understood but may have something to do with the shape of the particular pan and also the volume of piss in the skin willie. BPF's still only account for 5% of Power Fish.
The science behind a bonus power fish is still poorly understood but may have something to do with the shape of the particular pan and also the volume of piss in the skin willie. BPF's still only account for 5% of Power Fish.
Re-enters the room....<Thinks> Fucking dynamite Power Fish.
She <thinks> wierd cunt, sounded like a power dump, I wonder if his arse is prolapsed?
She <thinks> wierd cunt, sounded like a power dump, I wonder if his arse is prolapsed?
by Brucester September 13, 2006
Farting technique. You have a really great girlfriend who you want to keep, but she keeps feeding you onions which are giving you massive flatulence. Your relationship hasn't developed well enough for you to grout in her presence so........as a massive bubble drops into place you
pull your anus sideways with your index finger commuting your fart from the obvious to an unexplained fffffff noise.
pull your anus sideways with your index finger commuting your fart from the obvious to an unexplained fffffff noise.
She was a right bobby dazzeler and sod's law I had a massive
shit gas attack, but I 'jap skewed' them all, luckily they were plain flavoured and stenchless so I'm on a promise for Thursday now!
shit gas attack, but I 'jap skewed' them all, luckily they were plain flavoured and stenchless so I'm on a promise for Thursday now!
by Brucester September 10, 2006
A continuous viscous blockage of the entire tract whereby the hydraulic effect of eating one meal simply guarantees that another is angrily spat out of the other end.
by Brucester September 16, 2006
A social class. Surprisingly (or not) one that crosses all accepted class structures. A scrunter cuts corners socially.
1. Always drops litter
2. Spills red wine on your furniture
3. Goes shopping in a paint splattered tracksuit
4. Leaves toilets in a mess
5. Is an inconsiderate housemate
6. Rough handles food in a supermarket or worse takes the lid off for a smell or a lick.
7. Smokes in public and always throws the butt in the urinal
8. Ditto chewing gum.
9. Spits in public.
10. Crunches large volumes of garlic and commutes by train.
11. Is fat and has the cheek to fly by plane but only book a single seat.
12. The list is endless but I think you get the picture.
** Don't waste a good word like scrunter as a derogatory name for a female!!**
2. Spills red wine on your furniture
3. Goes shopping in a paint splattered tracksuit
4. Leaves toilets in a mess
5. Is an inconsiderate housemate
6. Rough handles food in a supermarket or worse takes the lid off for a smell or a lick.
7. Smokes in public and always throws the butt in the urinal
8. Ditto chewing gum.
9. Spits in public.
10. Crunches large volumes of garlic and commutes by train.
11. Is fat and has the cheek to fly by plane but only book a single seat.
12. The list is endless but I think you get the picture.
** Don't waste a good word like scrunter as a derogatory name for a female!!**
by Brucester April 04, 2004
Honey...........I was wondering.........when you give me a
BJ...why not blow instead of suck?!?....it might work.
As she blows you RASP one out. "Hey don't blow that hard,
it's not a trumpet.....now I've had a blartkin
BJ...why not blow instead of suck?!?....it might work.
As she blows you RASP one out. "Hey don't blow that hard,
it's not a trumpet.....now I've had a blartkin
by Brucester January 31, 2008
Someone who just doesn’t get on with their self inflicted, otherwise shitty life within their own patch or ghetto and who keeps cropping up as an indecent and ironic cameo in polite circles.
They gain access to the well ordered and pleasant lanes of middle England by sliding in as mock Middle Englanders. Once ensconced they then un-pack themselves like a virus
and degrade and erode everyone's life, causing havoc as they un-pick the fabric of communities, clubs and charities that do not have tight enough integrity in place. Power Chavs have one minor good use and that is they unwittingly subject the real Middle Englanders to a purity test,
depressingly some fail as they espouse the Power Chavs new, “No nonsense, modern and refreshingly convenient” lifestyle including the interesting, at first, patoir. All Power Chavs have a loud voice, are quite verbose and uncannily know certain parts of the law inside out.
They gain access to the well ordered and pleasant lanes of middle England by sliding in as mock Middle Englanders. Once ensconced they then un-pack themselves like a virus
and degrade and erode everyone's life, causing havoc as they un-pick the fabric of communities, clubs and charities that do not have tight enough integrity in place. Power Chavs have one minor good use and that is they unwittingly subject the real Middle Englanders to a purity test,
depressingly some fail as they espouse the Power Chavs new, “No nonsense, modern and refreshingly convenient” lifestyle including the interesting, at first, patoir. All Power Chavs have a loud voice, are quite verbose and uncannily know certain parts of the law inside out.
That x really is a Power Chav, have you noticed? They have talked their way onto the committee, changed everything, thrown out all the old time honoured traditions, frightened away the usual volunteers and now resigned in an undignified public outburst leaving the place in a state of total collapse.
by Brucester May 07, 2007