57 definitions by benny b from the bronx

Vodka drank the next day to defeat a vodka hangover; an update of hair of the dog that bit you. Other drinks could be substituted for vodka as long as you come up with a new animal. For example, hair of the demon that violated you could be tequila.
Bruce Lee: What's in that?
Jose Contreras: Some more vodka. I'm struggling from last night, hopefully this shit will ease me up.
Bruce Lee: Ahh, hair of the bear that mauled you, huh?
by benny b from the bronx August 17, 2007
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Bruce Lee: Look at this tile-faced motherfucker.
Jose Contreras: (muffled) Shut the fuck up
by benny b from the bronx August 17, 2007
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In poker, the instance in which a player with a very powerful hand calls instead of raising.
Jose Contreras: I flat called when I hit my trips on the flop and then raised on the turn... when Mr. T saw my hand he lunged at me in a fury.
Bruce Lee: Jesus, Mr. T is mentally unstable.
by benny b from the bronx February 22, 2005
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In poker, a pocket pair above the common cards in the middle. For example, if the flop is J-6-2, then pocket queens would be an overpair.
Jose Contreras: Dikembe Mutombo seems to always have an overpair when I play with him...
Bruce Lee: You're just bitter because he always takes you for thousands of bucks... he's an amazing player, give him his due.
by benny b from the bronx February 22, 2005
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A drunk who is shy until last call, at which point he'll try to hook up with anything that has a pulse and/or booze at home.
Bruce Lee: Damn, that quiet motherfucker is suddenly talking to all the transients, that is disgusting.
Jose Contreras: He's just a last call Lothario, typical bullshit.
by benny b from the bronx August 17, 2007
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6'1, 245 lbs, MLB, Ravens

Lewis was a standout at Kathleen High in Florida, at running back and linebacker. One reputable magazine ranked him as one of the top 10 high school football players of all time. He was an All-American at the U. of Miami before being drafted with the 26th pick overall by the Baltimore Ravens. He has led his team in tackles every year since his rookie season and led the whole NFL in 1997 and 1999.
Unfortunately, Ray's life took a turn for the worse on January 31st, 2000. Two men died in a street brawl that Ray witnessed without involvement; contrary to popular belief, he was simply at the wrong place at the wrong time. His one mistake was in lying to the police when first being questioned about whether he knew the two other co-defendants, probably to avoid being considered a rat. But after some time, Lewis decided to testify against the two men and settled for an obstruction of justice charge. There was never any hard evidence presented to suggest that Ray Lewis committed murder! However, #52 did not let the whole ordeal set him back; in fact he came back for the 2000 football season with a vengeance. Just to name a few accomplishments: he led the Ravens defense to a mere 165 points allowed (an NFL record), he garnered Defensive Player of the Year honors and finally won the coveted Super Bowl MVP award in leading the Ravens to a dominating victory in Super Bowl XXXV.
Still not satisfied with his success, Ray Lewis may have had his best season to date in 2003. He recorded 225 tackles (160 solo), forced 2 fumbles, intercepted 6 passes (a rarity for linebackers) and led the Ravens to win the AFC North Division yet again. All this amounted to his second NFL Defensive Player of the Year award.
A team of experts from USA Today recently rated Ray Lewis as the linebacker with the most strength, speed, acceleration, awareness and as the most valuable to his team and best tackler. Obviously, he was ranked as the best linebacker, but they also ranked him as the best overall player in the NFL.
Ray's opponents know from experience that it’s not his statistics that stand out the most for him; it’s the intangibles such as his incomparable intimidation of opponents and, at the same time, inspiration for his teammates. Another crucial aspect of Ray's immense success has been his uncanny ability to decode plays before they develop as he appears to have a psychic's vision for what will unfold. This of course comes from his dedication off the field in studying more film than a coach.
Ray will go down as one of the best defensive players of all time and perhaps the greatest linebacker ever.
Jose Contreras: Ray Lewis is the most intense, respectable man on the planet.
Bruce Lee: Yes, perhaps only rivaled by Pai Mei.
by benny b from the bronx February 23, 2005
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A person (usually male) with alarming proficiency in all things jizz-related. Since this insult will usually be interpreted as considerably homophobic, you may want to avoid using it in the vicinity of furious flamingos. I find it to be more effective as an adjective, which also conveniently takes some emphasis off of the ever-so taboo gay bashing aspect. A perfect example of a jizzwizard candidate would be one of your poor (aka not rich) friends resorting to acting as a beer queer in order to satisfy his alcoholism. The act itself is not what deserves the ridicule, but the pathetic nature of his financial status. If we've learned anything from the wise Patrick Bateman, it's that poor people require considerable derision. (I hope people take that last tangent seriously.)
Jose Contreras: You cock worshipping jizzwizard! Stop touching my radio!
Bruce Lee: (stares a hole into Contreras' skull) Wow, homophobes are awesome.
Jose Contreras: ...I'm sorry, you can have my radio?
by benny b from the bronx August 16, 2007
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