bachelor bob's definitions
n. A person who is sexually attractive due to the entirely natural state of their body; the person's defining characteristic. Not intentionally masculine, feminine, or androgynous, as those labels are continuously redefined by each society. Rather, a person who is overtly real, unmodified, and physically defined only by their genes and their interaction with the environment.
adj. (of a person) sexually attracted to unmodified people.
• involving or characterized by sexual attraction to natural body image : hikersexual desire.
adj. (of a person) sexually attracted to unmodified people.
• involving or characterized by sexual attraction to natural body image : hikersexual desire.
Oh Shari. I just can't take it anymore. All society offers me are metrosexuals, poofs, prettyboys, armchair warriors, billboard cowboys, and emos. I'm gonna' thru-hike the A.T. in hopes of finding one of those dreamy hikersexuals. You know; a *real* man!
<beeeep> Hey Bob... just wanted you to know. I threw my trophy wife out yesterday. I got tired of waking up next to someone I didn't recognize or want until after she'd spent 3 hours putting herself together every morning. I quit my job, put my place on the market, and am headed for the P.C.T. to locate one of those backcountry hikersexual babes. You know; a chick with brown body hair, everywhere nature intends.
<beeeep> Hey Bob... just wanted you to know. I threw my trophy wife out yesterday. I got tired of waking up next to someone I didn't recognize or want until after she'd spent 3 hours putting herself together every morning. I quit my job, put my place on the market, and am headed for the P.C.T. to locate one of those backcountry hikersexual babes. You know; a chick with brown body hair, everywhere nature intends.
by Bachelor boB December 30, 2007
Get the hikersexual mug.|ˈfrāvən|
n. compound word derived from 'fake' and 'raven,' the later term used to label naturally black hair on the rare person whose ethnicity does not dictate black hair color (e.g. Celtic, Southern European, and Baltic). This distinctly differs from an ethnicity that does dictate black hair (e.g. African, Asian, and Native American). Ergo, fraven is artificially black hair on someone who could potentially have naturally black hair. Term is gender neutral.
Most often found on emo and goth individuals. Intended as a counter-culture statement against flonde (fake blonde) and the accompanying mindset / disposition. Those with fraven hair virtually never grasp that fake hair color cannot be a true antithesis to another fake hair color. As artificially colored hair now makes up ~97% of all American females between the ages of 12 and 65, the truly counter-culture hair color is actually 'natural.'
n. compound word derived from 'fake' and 'raven,' the later term used to label naturally black hair on the rare person whose ethnicity does not dictate black hair color (e.g. Celtic, Southern European, and Baltic). This distinctly differs from an ethnicity that does dictate black hair (e.g. African, Asian, and Native American). Ergo, fraven is artificially black hair on someone who could potentially have naturally black hair. Term is gender neutral.
Most often found on emo and goth individuals. Intended as a counter-culture statement against flonde (fake blonde) and the accompanying mindset / disposition. Those with fraven hair virtually never grasp that fake hair color cannot be a true antithesis to another fake hair color. As artificially colored hair now makes up ~97% of all American females between the ages of 12 and 65, the truly counter-culture hair color is actually 'natural.'
Bob: "I see y'ur little girl's hair has darkened from Disney blonde to a boring, unsexy, natural brunette. How long b'fore her 'friends' convince her to turn herself into a flonde or a fraven?"
Paul: "Since her mother is not shallow enough to artificially color her hair and we promote education, not appearance, our daughter does not have any counter-productive role models."
Bob: "What're you, a terrorist? You tryin' to destroy A'murica?!"
Paul: "Since her mother is not shallow enough to artificially color her hair and we promote education, not appearance, our daughter does not have any counter-productive role models."
Bob: "What're you, a terrorist? You tryin' to destroy A'murica?!"
by Bachelor boB December 29, 2015
Get the fraven mug.An utterance of encouragement to treat a person/thing as being one's permanent possession/property, free to be mistreated/misused, especially when both the encourager and encouragee know such not to be the case. Commonly done when loss/destruction of a partner/object is imminent, or when one does not take the partner's next partner/item's next owner into consideration.
Kris: I don't think it's going to work between Jamil and me. Our relationship seems so tenuous.
Paul: When you know it's all but over, bone it like you own it!
Andreas: I've been using Paul's car while he's on a 5-week hike, but I'm afraid that it's about to die of its own accord.
Booby: If it's on its way out anyway, bone it like you own it.
Paul: When you know it's all but over, bone it like you own it!
Andreas: I've been using Paul's car while he's on a 5-week hike, but I'm afraid that it's about to die of its own accord.
Booby: If it's on its way out anyway, bone it like you own it.
by Bachelor boB September 21, 2012
Get the bone it like you own it mug.A sexual partner used as exercise equipment, specifically for aerobic, standing, rear-entry penetration. To qualify, the penetrator must manipulate his partner's nipples.
co-worker: "Bob, you're looking fit."
Bob: "You bet! It's amazing what 10 minutes a day on my nipliptical does for the glutes."
Bob: "You bet! It's amazing what 10 minutes a day on my nipliptical does for the glutes."
by Bachelor boB May 19, 2007
Get the nipliptical mug.malk
noun
Any milk alternative made from a non-dairy source (e.g. soy, rice, oats, spelt, bulgar, hemp, coconut, almond, cashew, hazelnut, macadamia, pistachio, sunflower, etc.). Since the National Milk Producers Federation is trying to convince the Food and Drug Administration to outlaw the labeling of any product as "milk" that does not come from a mammary gland, a new name is needed. And since humans should not be drinking liquid from any mammary gland other than a human's, "malk" is definitely the healthiest and least gross choice after a person is weaned.
noun
Any milk alternative made from a non-dairy source (e.g. soy, rice, oats, spelt, bulgar, hemp, coconut, almond, cashew, hazelnut, macadamia, pistachio, sunflower, etc.). Since the National Milk Producers Federation is trying to convince the Food and Drug Administration to outlaw the labeling of any product as "milk" that does not come from a mammary gland, a new name is needed. And since humans should not be drinking liquid from any mammary gland other than a human's, "malk" is definitely the healthiest and least gross choice after a person is weaned.
Mom: "Do you want whole or chocolate milk on your Frosted Flakes?"
Son: "Seriously?! Do I look like a calf or are you just trying to make me diabetic? I'll take hemp malk on my organic, non-GMO, fair trade muesli, thank you very much."
Son: "Seriously?! Do I look like a calf or are you just trying to make me diabetic? I'll take hemp malk on my organic, non-GMO, fair trade muesli, thank you very much."
by Bachelor boB January 3, 2017
Get the malk mug.A category of fatality invoked during, and due to, the self-taking of a photograph. Like a 'Darwin Award' recipient, but a true event.
Did you hear about the couple's fatal fall in Yosemite National Park while taking a cliff edge photo in October 2018? Just another case of natural selfielection.
by Bachelor boB October 31, 2018
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n. An enlisted member of the US military below the rank of E-5. Someone without sufficient authority over anyone/anything to cause any real affect. Considered inept by anyone E-6 or higher, regardless of how demonstrably capable. Used in a derogatory fashion by E-6 and above; used in a amiable fashion by E-5 and below. *The* place to be in the US military.
n. An enlisted member of the US military below the rank of E-5. Someone without sufficient authority over anyone/anything to cause any real affect. Considered inept by anyone E-6 or higher, regardless of how demonstrably capable. Used in a derogatory fashion by E-6 and above; used in a amiable fashion by E-5 and below. *The* place to be in the US military.
Shitstain: "This P-way hasn't been swabbed in over 12 hours! Get some E-nothing in here with a bucket."
E-5: "Time to bust up the Khakis with an E-nothing luncheon."
E-5: "Time to bust up the Khakis with an E-nothing luncheon."
by Bachelor boB June 18, 2010
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