author 's definitions

Telethon Boy

Yet another nickname for George W. Bush (because of his resemblance to those stuttering retarded kids on those telethons for the disabled).

"Please help, c-c-call now"
Telethon Boy is on TV again; I really hope they find a cure for whatever he has.

by Author June 17, 2006

Dick Cheney

An oily, whorefaced, bean-stealing enemy of the people. Dick Cheney completed the long-rumored merger of Halliburton and the Whitehouse. Under Dick Cheney’s guidance Halliburton became a de facto government agency, overseeing policy decisions as well as spending billions in public funds. Dick Cheney also shot a senior citizen in the face, while poaching quail, at a canned hunt (after drinking). He was then taken off the NRA Christmas card list.

Which feeble oligarch attempted to throw a pitch at a Nationals’ game but was too weak to make it over the plate?
A. Montgomery Burns
B. Dick Cheney

The answer is B.

by Author June 17, 2006

NeoCon Jihad

A term that refers to the NeoConservative Jihad.

Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfailed are the architects of the NeoCon Jihad.

by author June 21, 2006

Friend of Tom

Friend of Tom: a Scientologist.

I heard that dude is a friend of Tom.
Yeah, it's creepy.

by author June 25, 2006

Ted Stevens

Shamefully ignorant and criminally insane, Ted Stevens is an Alaska senator. Too old to understand things, Ted Stevens thought the Internet was a "series of tubes." Also tried to build a $200mil bridge to a property he owned. Set phazers to steal.

Ted Stevens: aka "A series of Teds" and "The Pork King"

by author September 1, 2006

claptrap

Pretentious, pompous, nonsensical and or empty language (especially while pandering to an audience).

I've had enough of your claptrap.

by author September 6, 2006

hit the trees

To smoke pot (probably comes from the resemblance of buds to trees).

I hit the trees harder than Sonny Bono.

by author September 19, 2006