author's definitions

Tom Delay

Former house majority leader; resigned in disgrace. A criminally insane political prostitute with no conscience. Tom Delay is known to give handjobs to lobbyists for wooden nickels.

Tom Delay says: I'll jerk you off for a cheeseburger and a trip to St. Andrews.

by author July 16, 2006

Megawatts

A doctor prescribed bath to treat heterosexuality in which the person affected soaks in warm water while ten litres of boiled semen is poured over their head.

That person smells like they just had a megawatts or two.

by Author March 7, 2003

sport utility vehicle

A terrorist fundraiser on wheels. A machine that turns large amounts of the world's bloodiest conflict commodity into a poison gas so fat-rich people can get from their televisions to their sedentary jobs without having to stand up.

When filling your sport utility vehicle and watching the numbers on the pump go up, somewhere the same thing is happening to a terrorist's bank account. Stop buying these things you vain, insecure little twats.

by author October 14, 2006

Telethon Boy

Yet another nickname for George W. Bush (because of his resemblance to those stuttering retarded kids on those telethons for the disabled).

"Please help, c-c-call now"
Telethon Boy is on TV again; I really hope they find a cure for whatever he has.

by Author June 17, 2006

Karl Rove

The Whitehouse deputy chief of staff. An overweight Sith lord with the conscience of a slave trader.

Karl Rove: "You don't get to be an overweight sith lord by eating reasonably sized portions; I put down as many of those $50 lobbyist meals as Abramoff will give me."

by author September 30, 2006

Neocon

Neoconservative. Criminally insane spenders that believe in killing brown people for the new world order. Huge Orwellian government, unfathomable amounts of spending, bomb tens of thousands of people to death to rearrange the globe. Take the worst aspects of the liberal and conservative positions and combine them into one and you would have a NeoCon.

Neocons are the greatest threat to life, liberty and property this country has ever known.

by Author June 30, 2006

Republican Party

The homosexual pedophiles’ party. Dedicated to sheltering homosexual pedophiles.

RepublicanParty: Do I make you horny?
Underage_boy23: A little.
Republican Party: Cool.

by author October 5, 2006