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Definitions by aspirex

square root of sweet fuck all 

1: I've got about the square root of sweet fuck all beer in this place.

pants optional 

Pants optional, if used at a party, actually means that pants are not allowed. All people must drop their trousers immediately (unless they have no underwear)
1: Why are you wearing pants?
2: Because my legs would get cold otherwise.
1: But it's pants optional.
2: Oh. (Drops pants)
pants optional by Aspirex November 17, 2005

shnorkel 

A technique for the rapid consumption of beer from bottles. A bendy straw is inserted into the top of the bottle, and is bent over the side; then, the beer can be consumed from the mouth of the bottle, leaving the bendy straw exposed to allow air into the bottle.
1: Everyone outside, we're shnorkelling.
shnorkel by Aspirex November 17, 2005

poofter stick

The spider, as used in a game of pool (it's like a cue except with a plastic X on the end) which is used for making shots where it is difficult to lean across the table. Called the poofter stick, as it takes the easy way out.

By convention, if a player uses the poofter stick and fails to sink their shot, then the stick is automatically named after that player. Their name remains attached to the stick until another player misses a shot.
Craig: Ball's too far away. I'm gonna use the poofter stick.

(He misses the shot; later)

Bill: Pass the Craig Stick.
poofter stick by Aspirex November 17, 2005

slab party

Specifically, a party which occurs because a group of people have won a lot of slabs of beer, and the express purpose of the party is to drink all of the slabs in one go.
Ten slabs from the trivia night... slab party next week!
slab party by Aspirex November 17, 2005

five cougars thanks 

The catch-cry to any woman with large breasts, or more amusingly, any man with large man boobs.

This catchcry is based upon the advertisement for Cougar Bourbon:
Man in bar queue: (VO, trying to remember the order he is making) Two gin and tonics, two vodkas, and a scotch. Two gin and tonics, two vodkas, and a scotch. Two gin and tonics, two vodkas, and a scotch. (He reaches the front of the queue, passing a confused-looking man with bourbon and cokes. He sees the bartender, a gorgeous, buxom blonde.)
Bartender: Yes?
Man in bar queue: Five Cougars thanks. (We see "Cougar Bourbon" is emblazoned upon the bartender's singlet top; the man blinks, confused.)
(Yelled at a fat cricketer who comes on to bat) Five cougars thanks!
five cougars thanks by Aspirex November 17, 2005

rogaining 

A particularly munt-filled beer drinking event. Competitors compete head to head in an event in which they must skol one beer at each of five stations, and sprint around 50m between stations (often a circuit is set up with the first and last stops at the same station). Notorious for shaking and bloating the stomach while drinking, causing mass amounts of high-velocity chunder into bins which are generally kept at the stations.
D'ya see him munt all over himself at the rogaining?
rogaining by Aspirex November 17, 2005