Yopmail User's definitions

Cop

Latin for "donut fetishist."

Mentions of donut restaurants are telltale signs that the dude you're talking to is actually an undercover cop who's ready to molest you.

by Yopmail User December 24, 2022

new years

To perform this sex act, you need to gather the vomit, shit, saliva, and cum/vaginal fluids of ten kindergarteners whose birthdays fall on January/September 1st, as well as your own. Pour them in a blender and let the mixture blend for thirty minutes. After it's finished, make a human centipede out of the kindergarteners with a staplegun, feed the mixture and some laxatives to the first kid, and quickly staple his anus to the last kid's mouth to finish the cycle of gurgling and shitting. It should be noted that the kids will try to break free, so it won't hurt to glue their limbs to the floor. After an hour, break the link between the first and last kid, give the first kid Diet Coke and Mentos up the ass, and quickly staple his ass to the last kid's mouth. Finish the act by beating off on each kid's face.

New Years is every politician's favorite sex act.

by Yopmail User January 8, 2023

Grimace

(v.) To frown. Period. Not some McDonald's sex act or some shit.

Alice grimaced when Bob emasculated himself with his pants zipper at their son's school. His cock and balls fell right in the boy's mouth.

by Yopmail User July 1, 2023

you're

Yes, this word exists.

Simply put, a contraction that means "you are." Overlooked by morons who wouldn't know proper grammar if it dismembered them and fed their limbs to Ronald McDonald.

If you find yourself confusing it with "your," replace it with "you are" and see if it makes sense (i.e. read it aloud).

YOU'RE a sad excuse for a human being and YOUR parents should be ashamed they even thought of having you if you still can't tell the difference between the two.

by Yopmail User July 2, 2023

Neighbor

To force-feed a kid some grass, make him chew the dog shit off your lawn while you penetrate them anally, strip him naked in your home, and try to suck his dick with a vacuum cleaner. If his dick is ripped off within five seconds, rape him again and fire a gun next to his ear until he goes deaf. Make him down every bottle of alcohol you have and penetrate him in his eye sockets as hard as possible. Finish the act off by shoving him in a toilet and throwing shit at him while yelling slurs and insults (not that he'll hear them). Make him eat the shit afterwards, ejaculate and vomit in his mouth and on his face, shove Diet Coke and Mentos up his ass, and have everything on camera.

Neighbor your neighbors' kids for some free porn.

by Yopmail User July 3, 2023

antidisestablishmentarianism

1. (n.) Opposition of the separation of church and state.
2. (n.) A word you can't spell correctly. I can.
3. (n.) A word you only know exists because of that Wikipedia definition you read five seconds ago.

1. Antidisestablishmentarianism was first developed in 19th century Britain. Blah blah blah blah shit no one cares about.
2. Stand in front of the mirror with your pants down and spell antidisestablishmentarianism at the top of your lungs. I dare you.
3. Real antidisestablishmentarians don't use Wikipedia. Grow some balls.

by Yopmail User July 4, 2023

Proper Grammar

Stuff you'll never find on this website. Basically every definition looks like a bunch of illiterate five-year-olds who just learned how to use the computer wrote them. Common mistakes include mistaking "your" for "you're" or vice versa, using "their," "there," and "they're," "loose" and "lose," or "who" and "whom" interchangeably, not knowing the difference between hyphens, en dashes and em dashes, problems with capitalization, run-on sentences, sentence fragments, lack of subject-verb agreement and/or punctuation, etc.

Proper grammar's extremely hard to come by these days.

by Yopmail User July 4, 2023