A giant pickup truck or SUV that’s so tall and heavy that most impacts, especially those involving children, will result in fatality. On a normal car, if it hits you, you can usually roll onto the hood and off the side because the top of the hood is 2 feet off the ground. A kiddie squisher is typically 5 feet off the ground, so that’s not an option, so your only option is to go forward and onto the ground, which is much more dangerous.
On top of that, the hood obstructs your vision because of its sheer size, the car is difficult to turn, and the sheer weight of the car makes it slow to stop, so avoiding obstacles is difficult in a kiddie squisher.
On top of that, the hood obstructs your vision because of its sheer size, the car is difficult to turn, and the sheer weight of the car makes it slow to stop, so avoiding obstacles is difficult in a kiddie squisher.
Anyone who drives a kiddie squisher like a Ford F-150 or a Chevy Silverado is clearly compensating for something.
by WeAlsoDoSomeTrolling September 02, 2022
Get the Kiddie Squisher mug.It’s simple: don’t do anything Christmassy until Dec 1st. Don’t put up Christmas decorations, don’t vibe to Christmas music, and don’t dress like Santa Claus until November is over.
Alex: ZOMG! ITS NOV 1st AND YOU STILL DONT HAVE YOUR CHRISTMAS TREE UP? GET WITH THE TIMES!!!!!1!!!1!
Bryan: No Noel November,
man.
Bryan: No Noel November,
man.
by WeAlsoDoSomeTrolling November 22, 2020
Get the No Noel November mug.Wounds attained from assembling IKEA furniture. Typically the ones that have metal rods and such that need to bend so the screws line up.
I have an IKEA bite on my hand from a particularly nasty Lillåsen that I assembled while moving into a college apartment.
by WeAlsoDoSomeTrolling August 22, 2022
Get the IKEA Bite mug.A portmanteau of car + barbarian. Someone who clearly got their drivers license in a box of Cracker Jacks. These are people who behave like complete assholes behind the wheel and refuse to recognize the humanity of anyone who isn’t in a car, and frequently the other drivers on the road as well.
Typical traits of carbarians:
-Always driving at 20 mph above the speed limit, even in residential areas
-Removing the mufflers from their cars for no other reason than to make more noise
-Intentionally running over cyclists and pedestrians
-Voting against anything that would be convenient to anyone other than themselves and other carbarians, thereby turning their town into a mess of freeways, traffic jams, overpasses, and parking lots for shitty chain restaurants
-Having religious objections to using their turn signals
-Driving drunk or distracted
-Owning a low mileage car
-Having way too many political bumper stickers
-Honking at non-carbarians for doing the speed limit
-Hit and runs
-Always driving at 20 mph above the speed limit, even in residential areas
-Removing the mufflers from their cars for no other reason than to make more noise
-Intentionally running over cyclists and pedestrians
-Voting against anything that would be convenient to anyone other than themselves and other carbarians, thereby turning their town into a mess of freeways, traffic jams, overpasses, and parking lots for shitty chain restaurants
-Having religious objections to using their turn signals
-Driving drunk or distracted
-Owning a low mileage car
-Having way too many political bumper stickers
-Honking at non-carbarians for doing the speed limit
-Hit and runs
by WeAlsoDoSomeTrolling April 24, 2022
Get the Carbarian mug.A so-called “Chinese restaurant” where almost everything on the entire menu is fried. The owner of a Frynese place is rarely ever actually Chinese, nor are the majority of the clientele.
If you don’t mind getting the runs afterwards, you can find Frynese restaurants in virtually any town, regardless of size. Their menu consists of fried pork, fried chicken, fried beef, fried fish, fried shrimp, fried squid, fried vegetables for those trying to eat healthy, fried rice, and fried fries. The only clue that this is even supposed to be a Chinese restaurant is that they have soy sauce and sweet and sour sauce instead of ketchup and mayo. The menu probably isn’t even in Mandarin. And a fortune cookie which they’d fry if they could.
by WeAlsoDoSomeTrolling June 27, 2025
Get the Frynese mug.A level of Dating Hell deeper than the Friendzone. In the Spendzone, a girl will pretend to be into you so she can convince you to buy her expensive gifts, only to dump you for a richer guy. Then lather, rinse, and repeat.
I spent $3500 on a Gucci purse for my girlfriend, only for her to Spendzone me and run off with some real estate developer in West Austin.
by WeAlsoDoSomeTrolling July 11, 2025
Get the Spendzone mug.by WeAlsoDoSomeTrolling April 23, 2023
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