Cuntemolegist: A specialist in the field of cuntemolegy. Many young men and even women these days begin early stages of this training in high school, continuing on to university or college, and into early adulthood. Professional cuntemolegists must pass the bar exam offered only by the Vernon Associated Genital Inspectors National Association, or simply V.A.G.I.N.A. Professional cuntemolegists must log over one thousand hours of intimate vaginal inspection and be able to log and classify all known types of human vaginas.
Tony was in deep in preparation for his cuntemolegists exam, the four girls in his dorm room lay side by side on his bed, legs high in the air, while Tony tested various theories of taste, stimulation, and sensatation. Tony loaded new batteries in the cuntemolegists secret weapon, the high speed monstervibe! bearded clam pussy gash
by vinter July 02, 2010
Squifter; Very rare in america today. A squifter is a very small high-pitched, but long and squeaky, fart than only girls with small bodies and tight tight asses can emit. In today's large assed booty fascinated culture, most women are too heavy by the age of twelve, to be able to produce a quality squifter. Heaver woman are capable of emitting "hissers, gulliens, and rastallions...but not squifters.
I could not believe Marie, she was so small and pretty, her perfectly formed ass would have fit into a baby's booster seat! As she sat beside me and chatted with the couple accross from us I suddenly heard a long high pitched squeak, just like a mouse in destress! I was so excited...an actual squifter! My mother told me "If a girl can produce a squifter, she will always be pretty and nice...you marry a girl who can squif son!
by Vinter April 30, 2008
A condition that happens to small children once famly and guests begin to arrive for the Christmas holidays. Affected children seem to suddenly change from doe-eyed angels to fanged fire-breathing monsters running around screaming and terrorizing adults several times their size. Adults often take the wrong measures to cure this affliction, offering consolation, or saying "please quiet down darling" etc. The easiest way to quickly cure the child is to lower the child's pants, exposing the bare flesh of the buttocks, then using a large wooden spoon, administer several sharp blows to the exposed area. A sharp "crack" followed by a scream and a promise of "I'll be good, I'll be good" indicates the child is cured. Be warned, sometimes a second or third application may be required to jog the childs memory of his/her promise to be "good"
Soon after grandma arrived, little Billy began running around the house and throwing lego at the guests. As Billy's behaviour worsened, it bacame obvious that Billy had become severely bratified. Grandpa reacted by scooping Billy up as he came running around a corner. He quickly readjusted Billy's attitude with a stinging slap to the rump.
by vinter December 29, 2009
Ballzheimers Disease strikes many men in their late seventies and early eighties. Medical experts agree a long history of deviant sexual behaviour as well as drinking chemical beer contribute to this disorder, in which the affected men; forget where their balls are, forget they have balls, or begin to play with their balls incessantly forgetting all else.
Barry, fond of telling his favourite stories of barnyard sex, experienced a sudden onset of Ballzheimers disease right after his 81st birthday. Barry forgot his history of having sex with poultry, and began to watch "Oprah" and reruns of "Little house on the Prairie".
Barry forgot all about constantly fondling his balls while he talked, forgot all about sex in general, and soon was completely overtaken by the disease.
Barry forgot all about constantly fondling his balls while he talked, forgot all about sex in general, and soon was completely overtaken by the disease.
by Vinter July 21, 2008
cuntwatulated: A generic term referring to vaginal ageing. The female genital area usually warms to it's purpose in the teen years as it officially becomes "pussy", in the late teens to mid twenties it is often referred to as a "puss", "quim" etc. From the early thirties on, words such as "bearded clam", "gash" and "twat" come into play. From the late forties into the mid fifties, often around the time of menopause, the female gential region goes through the change known as "cuntwatulation, and hence, becomes "cuntwatulated"
Mary was growing older, her desire for sex had dwindled since she had become cuntwatulated in her early fifties, but she still felt the need for sex every now and then. Fortunately this could be quickly forgotten by eating a pound of ice cream.
by Vinter April 22, 2008